Coaching abuse - parents, how far will you let it go?

[Unregistered]

Look for a club where none of the board members have kids in the club. At least one top club in Portland has this.

Good point. We are at an outlying club (not Bend-have heard good things about Bend). Board members with kids on teams. Board kids on easy street. Otherwise DOC in it for the money & could care less about the kids who aren't children of his board or personal friends. Figure it's the same at most any club.

[Unregistered]

After attending a soccer practice for one of my kids in the U11 age group, I was shocked by the behavior of the coach. This coach is highly credentialed and several parents told me what a good coach he/she is, however I observed that no parents ever stayed and observed the practices so they had no basis to stand on. The rolling of the eyeballs, the yelling at the kids for not being able to follow the complex drills, the constant sarcasm, and the groaning and moaning from the coach absolutely unsettled me. I'm thinking, you've got to be kidding me - this person is seriously a youth coach? He/she is acting like a frustrated teenager. What was even more troubling is that the kids were really trying. There was no laughter, no smiling - just good behavior all around.

Parents, please provide examples of what you think is coach abuse? I am thinking that we might be a lightweight as parents. What some parents might think is abuse, other parents might think is good, old-fashioned coaching. Where do you draw the line?

Light weight parenting and this is probably your first time thru with your precious little princess? Parents who have been thru this and know what to expect when you start club. This isn't rec anymore get over it. You pansy! You must be the parent that thinks your special little snow flake can't do any wrong. And should be starting on the first team? Actually you and your sorry attitude is what's wrong with youth sports!

Question for you: how long have you been with this coach?
Has this coach been coaching this group for awhile?
Is your snow flake on the first or second team?
Do you think your snow flake is placed on the appropriate team?

[Unregistered]

Light weight parenting and this is probably your first time thru with your precious little princess? Parents who have been thru this and know what to expect when you start club. This isn't rec anymore get over it. You pansy! You must be the parent that thinks your special little snow flake can't do any wrong. And should be starting on the first team? Actually you and your sorry attitude is what's wrong with youth sports!

Question for you: how long have you been with this coach?
Has this coach been coaching this group for awhile?
Is your snow flake on the first or second team?
Do you think your snow flake is placed on the appropriate team?

The girl is 11 years old and you are calling her out as a snowflake? Are you the coach or just a jerk.

I'm not the OP but even though "this isn't rec anymore" abusive behavior is not coaching. Yelling at kids does not motivate them and it does not in fact make them "tougher". It is youth soccer, not the Marines.

You need to grow up.

[Unregistered]

It is the troll so just ignore them. They will attempt to hijack every thread.

[Unregistered]

Agree. Our DoC is king of the castle. The board does nothing (besides several who work tirelessly to aid their own children, and really only their own children). He makes a lot of money off the players and doesn't care if some walk. His way or the highway. My advice would be to find a coach (and team) that is best for your child and go there as soon as financially possible.

Glad to hear others have the same experience. Our DOC is definitely Director of Corruption. We were not even with our club for three months and we gave the DOC notice that we wanted to leave the club three weeks before fall season started. The only reason they have the no refund policy is that they say they are denying another player a roster spot when you accept your spot. The ridiculousness of this policy is that this club continues to add players throughout the year - they accepted 4 players over the summer - so we aren't taking away revenue from the club. We paid in full ($1550!) and the DOC wouldn't even five us a pro-rated refund. We were extremely unhappy with the coaching, yet this DOC won't look at the best interest of our child. The problem with these DOCs is that they have no real outside business experience because this kind of BS won't fly in the real business world. If a client is unhappy with a product and service, businesses typically work out a solution and give a partial refund. Our DOC needs to put on big boy pants and grow up.

[Unregistered]

Look for a club where none of the board members have kids in the club. At least one top club in Portland has this.

Please share the name of this club. Unfortunately, when I went around the DOC to the board president, he said he has no power and has to leave the refund decisions to the DOC. I found out later that he is tightly networked with the DOC and he has kids playing in the club so he was biased.

[Unregistered]

Glad to hear others have the same experience. Our DOC is definitely Director of Corruption. We were not even with our club for three months and we gave the DOC notice that we wanted to leave the club three weeks before fall season started. The only reason they have the no refund policy is that they say they are denying another player a roster spot when you accept your spot. The ridiculousness of this policy is that this club continues to add players throughout the year - they accepted 4 players over the summer - so we aren't taking away revenue from the club. We paid in full ($1550!) and the DOC wouldn't even five us a pro-rated refund. We were extremely unhappy with the coaching, yet this DOC won't look at the best interest of our child. The problem with these DOCs is that they have no real outside business experience because this kind of BS won't fly in the real business world. If a client is unhappy with a product and service, businesses typically work out a solution and give a partial refund. Our DOC needs to put on big boy pants and grow up.

Stop blaming others for your own stupid, uniformed decisions. Do your research first and this would not have happened. I love America! Everybody expects to be treated like a princess. No wonder this country will never be very competitive despite the best athletes in the world.

[Unregistered]

Light weight parenting and this is probably your first time thru with your precious little princess? Parents who have been thru this and know what to expect when you start club. This isn't rec anymore get over it. You pansy! You must be the parent that thinks your special little snow flake can't do any wrong. And should be starting on the first team? Actually you and your sorry attitude is what's wrong with youth sports!

Question for you: how long have you been with this coach?
Has this coach been coaching this group for awhile?
Is your snow flake on the first or second team?
Do you think your snow flake is placed on the appropriate team?

Based on your response, you sound like you are guilty of abuse. You must be one of those abusive coaches.

In answer to your questions, we haven't been with the coach for long. It was only 3 weeks and this coach is new to the club. Yes, our "snowflake" is on the first team and our snowflake was placed on the appropriate team. Our snowflake is a boy, btw.

I played D1 in college so I am accustomed to tough coaches and abusive coaches. My children have been playing competitive soccer for 7 years, and we have been exposed to many coaches, so your accusation that I am a pansy and a lightweight is unfounded. This coach is definitely abusive. You sound like you have some problems and may need some psychiatric assistance. perhaps you are an abusive coach yourself and you are trying to justify your actions. Having issues getting a real job? Struggling financially so you take out your frustrations on little kids and power trip?

[Unregistered]

Stop blaming others for your own stupid, uniformed decisions. Do your research first and this would not have happened. I love America! Everybody expects to be treated like a princess. No wonder this country will never be very competitive despite the best athletes in the world.

We did the research and the club lied to us. The coaches sucked. Do you really think coaches and DOCs are infallible? You probably don't even know what infallible means. You must be a DOC or a coach that can't get a real job.

[Unregistered]

We did the research and the club lied to us. The coaches sucked. Do you really think coaches and DOCs are infallible? You probably don't even know what infallible means. You must be a DOC or a coach that can't get a real job.

Here is a novel idea - talk to the parents of kids on that coaches team. See what they think. Look up the coaches credentials and where they coached prior. Google their name. You had a ton of options and obviously failed to do your due diligence, so you just point a finger and ask someone else to bail you out.

Stop being so naive - every kid that leaves a club mid season has some sort of impact to both the team they were on and club's financial obligation. Perhaps the club was better off without you whiners anyway. Thanks for donating and cheers to being so hapless.

[Unregistered]

We did the research and the club lied to us. The coaches sucked. Do you really think coaches and DOCs are infallible? You probably don't even know what infallible means. You must be a DOC or a coach that can't get a real job.

in·fal·li·ble
inˈfaləb(ə)l/
adjective
incapable of making mistakes or being wrong.
"doctors are not infallible"

Look - I did some research and found the answer. Took about 3 seconds. Take a lesson crybaby.

[Unregistered]

Here is a novel idea - talk to the parents of kids on that coaches team. See what they think. Look up the coaches credentials and where they coached prior. Google their name. You had a ton of options and obviously failed to do your due diligence, so you just point a finger and ask someone else to bail you out.

Stop being so naive - every kid that leaves a club mid season has some sort of impact to both the team they were on and club's financial obligation. Perhaps the club was better off without you whiners anyway. Thanks for donating and cheers to being so hapless.

Love your comment about "thanks for donating." You must be one of those people that love handouts and work on manipulating the system instead of doing real work. get a real job where accountability is tracked and you are measured.

[Unregistered]

in·fal·li·ble
inˈfaləb(ə)l/
adjective
incapable of making mistakes or being wrong.
"doctors are not infallible"

Look - I did some research and found the answer. Took about 3 seconds. Take a lesson crybaby.

Figured you'd have to look it up. As for calling my crybaby, I am not surprised. Uneducated people have to resort to name calling. You must be a coach or DOC!

[Unregistered]

Please share the name of this club.

http://www.fcportland.org/club/Staff/index_E.html

[Unregistered]

http://www.fcportland.org/club/Staff/index_E.html

No parents of players on the board? I'm liking FCP more and more. We have a board member parent (with no soccer experience) who actually helps decide which players make which teams at multiple age groups based on their own personal preferences/politics. Makes it easier on the DoC's workload though I guess.