Originally posted by Unregistered
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Referee Abuse
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Unregistered
Originally posted by Unregistered View PostNot enough money in it to ensure that. Something like 90% of new teenage referees quit after the first year because of referee abuse. I had a center in LO cup who had once played for coach (LOSC) and the coach kept calling him by his first name and was very passive aggressive. Hey Jimmy, can you explain to my how that was hand ball? Answer, actually dumb ass there is no such thing as handball... Hey Jimmy. Are you sure she was off-sides? I didn't see it that way.
I got my Grade 8 with a couple of my players two years ago. I was the only adult in the class. All kids, all players. Most hoping for a good part time job and to spend time in a game they enjoy. These kids were players and could have turned into something.
My DS very first game an adult called him a "****ing moron." What kind of club culture exists for that grown-up to say that to a 14 year old AR? In group play in Mt. Hood Challenge two years ago. Team from Arizona, don't remember the club.
If you want better referees, treat them better. To an earlier post, yes "we" all talk a big game and then are the biggest violators. My prior club would suspend parents from the grounds, coaches, even without league intervention. They had a very progressive policy on sideline conduct.
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Unregistered
Originally posted by Unregistered View PostState playoffs are important. National championships are important. Even then you have to take the cards you're dealt and hope the authorities are hiring the best they can. League games and tournaments are not important. Player safety is the number one priority.
State Cups are not important enough to berate a teenage referee. It’s not important enough to berate any referee.
National Championships shouldn’t even happen until U19. We put kids in environments to compete before they even know how to play the game correctly.
Personally, I believe it’s important at the Pro level where referees are doing their full time job. I would move the needle a bit and say college too but I’m torn.... only because results matter and keep coaches employed. But in the end a college coach is a mentor and helps the player get a good degree and move on. Soccer is second fiddle.
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Unregistered
Originally posted by Unregistered View PostIf you truly believe this then you are part of the problem.
State Cups are not important enough to berate a teenage referee. It’s not important enough to berate any referee.
National Championships shouldn’t even happen until U19. We put kids in environments to compete before they even know how to play the game correctly.
Personally, I believe it’s important at the Pro level where referees are doing their full time job. I would move the needle a bit and say college too but I’m torn.... only because results matter and keep coaches employed. But in the end a college coach is a mentor and helps the player get a good degree and move on. Soccer is second fiddle.
That said, parents need to teach their kids that refs make mistakes and are human. Sometimes things just won't go your way. When parents can't accept that fact neither will their kids and they'll become screamers themselves.
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Unregistered
Originally posted by Unregistered View PostNo of course it doesn't excuse bad behavior by adults. But they are important enough that whoever is in charge needs to make sure the best refs are in place. As more kids drop out of reffing there will be a shortage of better trained adult refs at some point.
That said, parents need to teach their kids that refs make mistakes and are human. Sometimes things just won't go your way. When parents can't accept that fact neither will their kids and they'll become screamers themselves.
Composed coach, quiet on the sidelines = cool and composed players on the field.
Crazy azz coach and parents on the sidelines complaining about every call = kids complaining and b!tching at referees.
I see it in 70% of the games that I’m a part of.
I was talking to a parent of a club in Germany. He told a story where the parents were complaining to the opposing teams parents and referees. The club decided to ban the parents from games for one month. The response from the kids was positive. They loved the environment without their parents being there.
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Unregistered
Originally posted by Unregistered View PostThey are not important enough. Not even close. Generally it’s the parents and coaches that are the problems during games. The kids just follow their lead.
Composed coach, quiet on the sidelines = cool and composed players on the field.
Crazy azz coach and parents on the sidelines complaining about every call = kids complaining and b!tching at referees.
I see it in 70% of the games that I’m a part of.
I was talking to a parent of a club in Germany. He told a story where the parents were complaining to the opposing teams parents and referees. The club decided to ban the parents from games for one month. The response from the kids was positive. They loved the environment without their parents being there.
Two years ago we had an issue at a club where the referee quit mid match and left crying. She was 15 years old. I worked with that club to update their policies that included parents being "suspended" from attending matches.
Most really good coaches understand it's about judgement calls and there is a lot of differences in how calls should/could be handled. These same good coaches aren't the ones remote controlling their players up and down the pitch as well. I discuss this with my own parents.
+1 regarding parents. Many need to chill. And not just on refs. I have two players who always ask they not be on the parent side because their parents constant criticism or "do this do that." I don't think I'm the only coach that has players with parents like this.
Teenage centers, if they are confident and active, are players, have a chance of going somewhere in the referee world. Encourage and support them. They are busy trying to manage the game correctly and don't need the coach or parents chipping at them.
Coaches. Get your grade 8 badge. It's a few hours home study and a 1 day class.
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Unregistered
A good coach/well run club won't tolerate bad parental behavior. Parents get a warning, after that a temporary ban and if need be a permanent one. If the player has no issues they shouldn't be penalized for their idiot parents. If they take their "star" (usually the kid isn't, just in the parent's mind) elsewhere, then so be it. If you've ever had a bad parent leave a team you know what a relief it is when they're gone.
Clubs also need to reprimand bad coaching behavior. Problem is unless say a DOC sees it or a parent complains the club may not even be aware of the issue. Ref organizations can file complaints but few refs will do it.
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Unregistered
Originally posted by Unregistered View PostI got to +1 this.
+1 regarding parents. Many need to chill. And not just on refs. I have two players who always ask they not be on the parent side because their parents constant criticism or "do this do that." I don't think I'm the only coach that has players with parents like this.
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As a ref assignor, I've had to stop parents from going after refs at the end U-9 games. That age group seems to be one of the worst for coach and parent behavior. And then the players complain about every call because the coaches and parents do it.
On the other end of the spectrum, I centered a game last weekend with an AR who had absolutely no idea of what he was doing and the players, parents, and coaches were awesome.
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Unregistered
Clubs and coaches talk about doing the right thing but too many are too invested and too mental to hold it together for a recreational sport.
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Unregistered
Go summarize:
1. if a referee blows a call, you can verbally chastise them.
2. If blown call leads to a goal, you can scream at him.
3. If it’s a bad offsides call, shut up. You are wrong.
4. Bad call leads to a PK, you must stay behind the touch line but you can use any projectiles you have on hand.
5. If a bad call costs your team a game then you may enter the pitch.
6. Lose a championship game due to bad call, you may follow the referees to their cars.
7. If multiple bad calls lead to losing a semi at Clash at the Border, you may call them the next day at work and whisper bad things.
8. Only in some circumstances can you ramp up from there. Always get at least three other soccer dads to approval before taking it to the next level.
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Unregistered
Originally posted by unregistered View Postgo summarize:
1. If a referee blows a call, you can verbally chastise them.
2. If blown call leads to a goal, you can scream at him.
3. If it’s a bad offsides call, shut up. You are wrong.
4. Bad call leads to a pk, you must stay behind the touch line but you can use any projectiles you have on hand.
5. If a bad call costs your team a game then you may enter the pitch.
6. Lose a championship game due to bad call, you may follow the referees to their cars.
7. If multiple bad calls lead to losing a semi at clash at the border, you may call them the next day at work and whisper bad things.
8. Only in some circumstances can you ramp up from there. Always get at least three other soccer dads to approval before taking it to the next level.
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Unregistered
Originally posted by Unregistered View PostGo summarize:
1. if a referee blows a call, you can verbally chastise them.
2. If blown call leads to a goal, you can scream at him.
3. If it’s a bad offsides call, shut up. You are wrong.
4. Bad call leads to a PK, you must stay behind the touch line but you can use any projectiles you have on hand.
5. If a bad call costs your team a game then you may enter the pitch.
6. Lose a championship game due to bad call, you may follow the referees to their cars.
7. If multiple bad calls lead to losing a semi at Clash at the Border, you may call them the next day at work and whisper bad things.
8. Only in some circumstances can you ramp up from there. Always get at least three other soccer dads to approval before taking it to the next level.
Coaches, STFU at the referee. You think they made that call just so you can complain? Coaches want to be heard. No. Nobody wants to hear you. Coaches should teach their players how to play, give them instruction, leave the refs alone. We allow coaches to complain during a match, after, where does it end? If you keep having issues with the referees during or after the match you need a reality check.
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Unregistered
Parent freaking out at Mt. Hood Challenge, Ref stops the game and tells a coach to go over and tell the parents to stop engaging the referee with verbal abuse. Coach says he doesn't know those parents, they are their supporting his team. Ref says he doesn't care and to tell them to knock it off. So coach from some team who doesn't know the parents walks across the pitch and tells some parents to STFU.
Some people are too invested in this game.
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Unregistered
Originally posted by Unregistered View PostParent freaking out at Mt. Hood Challenge, Ref stops the game and tells a coach to go over and tell the parents to stop engaging the referee with verbal abuse. Coach says he doesn't know those parents, they are their supporting his team. Ref says he doesn't care and to tell them to knock it off. So coach from some team who doesn't know the parents walks across the pitch and tells some parents to STFU.
Some people are too invested in this game.
"They are NOT there supporting his team."
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