What is the most frustrating part of the recruiting process?

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My 2020 DS and 2021 DD have been talking to coaches, inviting them to watch games, and have received good feedback. We are targeting correctly but feel very frustrated no one seems to really be seriously interested accept the schools they aren’t interested in. Not asking for advice but wanted to know if others feel frustrated too.

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Funny you should write this today. I am right there with you with my 2021 son. We are targeting high d3, and the only thing I can think of is that those coaches are busy with rising seniors. I hope this thread can be a positive one, though I'm not super optimistic about that!

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Funny you should write this today. I am right there with you with my 2021 son. We are targeting high d3, and the only thing I can think of is that those coaches are busy with rising seniors. I hope this thread can be a positive one, though I'm not super optimistic about that!

Your son is still early in the process. Top D3 are working on 2020 right now.

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My 2020 DS and 2021 DD have been talking to coaches, inviting them to watch games, and have received good feedback. We are targeting correctly but feel very frustrated no one seems to really be seriously interested accept the schools they aren’t interested in. Not asking for advice but wanted to know if others feel frustrated too.

Seems early for a 2021 girl. Coaches just started to be able to contact prospects in this grad year as of June 15. If your daughter wasn't one of those schools top prospects, they are likely waiting behind others to accept or decline offers.

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The 2021 boy is too early, especially for D3. It won't get busy for him until well into junior year and even at top D3s some offers may not come until early senior year

The 2021 girl is also on the early side if she isn't aiming for higher level programs. Junior year will also this should be a busy year for her. Prior to the rule changes she would have been closing in at this point but in theory the timeline is getting pushed back to be more similar to boys.

The 2020 boy is getting late but not all hope is lost. Plenty still get offers into senior year even for some lower level D1 programs and certainly for D3. If there are schools he really wants make sure to apply for Early Action and tell the coaches you're doing that. Act now to see if there's any other programs that might work and if they're running ID events.

The whole process is frustrating and stressful. Sometimes coaches can go radio silent for a long time - did they lose interest? Not always. Each coach has his own somewhat different timetable, needs, set of players he's looking at. Keep plugging away, keep up contact with coaches you've been talking to. Make sure you're targeting right, maybe broaden the search. But also know it doesn't happen for everybody.

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The 2021 boy is too early, especially for D3. It won't get busy for him until well into junior year and even at top D3s some offers may not come until early senior year

This class just finished their sophomore year, correct. Very early for D3 for either gender. If that is the target level, the camps this summer and high school play next fall will be important.

The 2021 girl is also on the early side if she isn't aiming for higher level programs. Junior year will also this should be a busy year for her. Prior to the rule changes she would have been closing in at this point but in theory the timeline is getting pushed back to be more similar to boys.

On the girls side she should be in play right now if coaches see her as a true prospect. Usually takes about six months for the whole process to work itself out for a prospect. Since low level D1 and upper level D2 programs typically wrap up their classes winter-spring of the classes junior year she should be just starting to get some notice.

The 2020 boy is getting late but not all hope is lost. Plenty still get offers into senior year even for some lower level D1 programs and certainly for D3. If there are schools he really wants make sure to apply for Early Action and tell the coaches you're doing that. Act now to see if there's any other programs that might work and if they're running ID events.

On the boys side, the money dries up real quick since there typically isn't a whole lot of it. If coaches generally see the boy as a money target, the boy would already be hearing from a few of them. Seems like D2/D3 might be a more realistic target.

The whole process is frustrating and stressful. Sometimes coaches can go radio silent for a long time - did they lose interest? Not always. Each coach has his own somewhat different timetable, needs, set of players he's looking at. Keep plugging away, keep up contact with coaches you've been talking to. Make sure you're targeting right, maybe broaden the search. But also know it doesn't happen for everybody.

Here's the big problem with all of this recruiting information.. what the heck is the club coaching doing? Seriously, what are you paying for? In each of these situations the family should have their "list" whittled down to at max 5 programs and the club coach should be asking all of these questions of them on your behalf. You have every right to expect them to do that. It's not really all that much work and if the college coach is ghosting them, then you take the clue and move on. Honestly if families did their research and targeting properly they should never be in this sort of predicament wondering whether coaches are aware of their kid and what their interest level might be. Finding a college placement for a player is not a passive activity and the club coach should be intimately involved. If they are not then you paired up with the wrong coach and got screwed. Vent your anger there.

[Unregistered]

This is totally frustrating process. Cuz some coaches don't answer you and you don't know if you should give up...send 3-4 emails about games or tourneys- than go a I'D camp but still nothing. Then kid tours the school nad likes it but still coach doesn't communicate at all.
So hard to move on to next school but I guess you gotta do it.

[Unregistered]

Here's the big problem with all of this recruiting information.. what the heck is the club coaching doing? Seriously, what are you paying for? In each of these situations the family should have their "list" whittled down to at max 5 programs and the club coach should be asking all of these questions of them on your behalf. You have every right to expect them to do that. It's not really all that much work and if the college coach is ghosting them, then you take the clue and move on. Honestly if families did their research and targeting properly they should never be in this sort of predicament wondering whether coaches are aware of their kid and what their interest level might be. Finding a college placement for a player is not a passive activity and the club coach should be intimately involved. If they are not then you paired up with the wrong coach and got screwed. Vent your anger there.

Most clubs will only do so much. Some coaches are idiots, some not even from here and don't fully understand US schools and the entire process. The majority of the heavy lifting is on the player and their family. And say a coach makes a phone call to gauge interest but the response is yes we really like Suzy but we aren't making decisions on that class quite yet."? You wait.

Also, once you're knee deep in it what are you going to do, change clubs? Too little too late at that point. Yes targeting is critical, but that doesn't mean the process will go smoothly or quickly. It's a long slog for most but the most in demand players.

[Unregistered]

This is totally frustrating process. Cuz some coaches don't answer you and you don't know if you should give up...send 3-4 emails about games or tourneys- than go a I'D camp but still nothing. Then kid tours the school nad likes it but still coach doesn't communicate at all.
So hard to move on to next school but I guess you gotta do it.

You have to keep a lot of balls in the air because there's just no telling how it will all play out. That coach could suddenly reach out tomorrow because now he's ready to make some offers, or you never heard from him again. It's a lot like like job hunting in many regards where companies can't even let you know they've hired someone else. You also can't fall too hard in love with any one program. The school, sure, but not the soccer. If the school is a perfect fit but soccer isn't going to happen then there's tough choices to be made. Good luck.

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All very helpful comments and insights.

Most programs take about a half dozen each year so coaches seem to recruit by positional needs. Of course, goal scorers are always in demand. And 6'3" beasts. But not sure coaches attempt to find the "best" players.

D1 is a significant commitment. Coaches have to figure out if a player has the passion that will last four years. Not sure if there's an accurate test but I've heard many mention that trait.

For your players' ego protection, it can help to remember many coaches don't really know what they're doing. Even the USWNT is arguably clueless but bailed about by having a roster that she could select a lineup from at random and still have odds of winning. And she's at the pinnacle!

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You have to keep a lot of balls in the air because there's just no telling how it will all play out. That coach could suddenly reach out tomorrow because now he's ready to make some offers, or you never heard from him again. It's a lot like like job hunting in many regards where companies can't even let you know they've hired someone else. You also can't fall too hard in love with any one program. The school, sure, but not the soccer. If the school is a perfect fit but soccer isn't going to happen then there's tough choices to be made. Good luck.

Our daughter was targeting D3, and our experience was also keeping multiple balls in the air for an extended period of time. Interest from coaches starting coming in earnest in sophomore year (some who my daughter had emailed in advance of tournaments and some unsolicited). Coaches kept her on their radar (watching games throughout soph and jr year) until conversations became more serious with pre-reads in summer after junior year. She did have one coach that expressed early interest after a camp and being seen at fall tournament, requested that she visit campus (which she did in the early spring junior year- no overnight), and then the coach stopped communicating so we assumed interest had faded - then in early fall of senior year this coach reached out again to my daughter and her club coach, asking her to come for a fall visit. It was strange; not sure if it was disorganization on the coach's part or she realized she had a gap in her roster to fill . . . a very strong team, too. Anyway. My point being - yes - multiple balls - extended time period of communication. It's hard to not know how this is all going to play out for such a long time period. Agree it's best to focus on prioritizing the school choice throughout the whole process. Good luck!

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Our daughter was targeting D3, and our experience was also keeping multiple balls in the air for an extended period of time. Interest from coaches starting coming in earnest in sophomore year (some who my daughter had emailed in advance of tournaments and some unsolicited). Coaches kept her on their radar (watching games throughout soph and jr year) until conversations became more serious with pre-reads in summer after junior year. She did have one coach that expressed early interest after a camp and being seen at fall tournament, requested that she visit campus (which she did in the early spring junior year- no overnight), and then the coach stopped communicating so we assumed interest had faded - then in early fall of senior year this coach reached out again to my daughter and her club coach, asking her to come for a fall visit. It was strange; not sure if it was disorganization on the coach's part or she realized she had a gap in her roster to fill . . . a very strong team, too. Anyway. My point being - yes - multiple balls - extended time period of communication. It's hard to not know how this is all going to play out for such a long time period. Agree it's best to focus on prioritizing the school choice throughout the whole process. Good luck!

Coaches go for their top picks first. If some reject the program the coach will go down the list until spots get filled. Sometimes it happens fast, others more slowly. It also gets tricky if you get 1 or 2 offers but they're not necessarily your top picks. Do you wait and hope or take an offer in hand? They'll give you a little time to decide but not much

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Coaches go for their top picks first. If some reject the program the coach will go down the list until spots get filled. Sometimes it happens fast, others more slowly. It also gets tricky if you get 1 or 2 offers but they're not necessarily your top picks. Do you wait and hope or take an offer in hand? They'll give you a little time to decide but not much

Yes, that's probably what happened in this case. My daughter didn't choose to pursue as it wasn't her first choice and she ultimately ended up there. Just speaking to the duration and weird turns in the process, and yes, it can be tricky and stressful! We had some coaches applying pressure for a decision during the summer while she was waiting for a confirmed offer from her 1st choice. It ended up working out for her, but it was pretty difficult for her to manage communications with the coaches and keep options open (in the midst of everything else going on senior year). I guess that's the same for many opting to pursue D3.

[Unregistered]

Just starting process this year for 2022 girl. Odd so far! Schools that we thought were appropriate target level not showing much interest, but she has gotten unsolicited interest from 3 programs that we thought were too far of a reach for her to target!!! All 3 have come to several league games (emailed by other players), have shown up to every game at the last 2 showcases/tourneys and follow up with her coach abt her after. Suffice to say, they are now at the top of her list-but we are still nervous that it's too good to be true.
Anybody else have a similar experience?

[Unregistered]

Just starting process this year for 2022 girl. Odd so far! Schools that we thought were appropriate target level not showing much interest, but she has gotten unsolicited interest from 3 programs that we thought were too far of a reach for her to target!!! All 3 have come to several league games (emailed by other players), have shown up to every game at the last 2 showcases/tourneys and follow up with her coach abt her after. Suffice to say, they are now at the top of her list-but we are still nervous that it's too good to be true.
Anybody else have a similar experience?

If they have reached out to her club coach that's a sign of more genuine interest. Getting an Id invite isn't an indication fo much of anything. But keep in mind she's still young and coaches will be limited by NCAA rules in how things can go over this next year. Make sure your D keeps up communication, invites to games/events etc. As for the other schools that seemed like targets? This is more art than science. It could also be because of her young age so don't throw in the towel yet.