Play the game because it is fun...

[Unregistered]

Supply and demand dictate the club soccer scene. There ARE way too many players chasing a dream that is likely beyond their reach but that is not the fault of the top players. The problem you see (if it really is a problem) is driven by the 2nd & 3rd tier players who aspire to those levels. They are the ones who are pushing the demand at the top end. If you want to lash out at something lash out at the clubs for marketing the system the way they do, not the players.

The " top players " are where they are because of their parents that fund the Club market. The " top " players in the past emerged from the pack, instead of being micro managed and engineered to be there.

Each time a bunch of parents feel the heat of the 2 nd and 3rd level on their heels, they enable the Club system with $$$ to establish a new league.

The parents of the " top players" constantly need their egos stroked, and the Clubs are right there with their hands out to provide it. Youth soccer has less and less to do with children, and more and more to do about parents.

Less than generation ago, parents DIDN"T even go watch them play. Now they live it nearly 24/7. And the money thrown at it ?You think that's progress ? You think that's healthy?

[Unregistered]

Your assumptions are insulting and show that you are out of touch with reality. You assume that competition does not occur at lower levels of play. In fact I would argue that in both the less and highly competitive venues that players levels of competitiveness overlap on a bell curve. The idea that a player on a B town team has less of a desire to win than the top player on the Stars A team is ridiculous. They may in fact have as much or more drive to succeed but less innate talent and (sometimes) less opportunity because of their family or demographic situation.

Furthermore, the "system is not working fine for all involved". Youth soccer is not a meritocracy but more of an aristocracy. It is too expensive, coaching is uneven in terms of being age appropriate and the premature emphasis on development encourages recruiting which in turn hinders development.

Too many parents think that development is something that is an individual achievement at it's core. Nothing could be further from the truth. Development takes place best in a team environment and MA soccer is not producing teams.

Despite all the coaching and money spent we are still failing to produce competent players.
Even at the highest levels (and I see alot of youth soccer) all we are producing are big fast strong players who run the field helter skelter like chickens with their heads cut off at 100 MPH cranking shots high and wide by 20 feet or more. Soccer in MA is regressing at exponential rates with each passing year.

Youth sports mirror child development theories so if you don't like the way they operate look to how society raises its children and change that first. The theme of all of the counter points in this thread is the system doesn't have to work for everyone. The sort of idealism all of you are espousing is utopian and just doesn't work. There are entities in place that provide the level of soccer and sort of experience many of you seek. Typically it is found in community based programs. The problem with them is they mostly focus on the experience so players don't get much of a challenge out of them. Eventually the bulk of the players lose interest so the numbers peter out and you have problems fielding teams. In a free market environment there will always be a club around to provide the same type of service but what many people find out is the price jumps dramatically and the quality ends up not being comensurate with that cost. Who's problem is that though? Is that really the top end of the market pulling those people up into a realm that they are not prepared for or is it that other end of the market who are trying to find something that really can't be delivered? The problem is that as price goes up so too do expectations and that segement of the soccer player population typcially doesn't want to meet those higher expectations so it becomes a catch 22. People get charged more so they expect more but then don't want to pay the price to fulfill the increased expectations that come with incrementally better coaching so then everything sucks. I'm sorry, the solution isn't to tear everything down so the casual player can have a better experience. The solution is to either demand better from your clubs or set more realistic expectations

[Unregistered]

The " top players " are where they are because of their parents that fund the Club market. The " top " players in the past emerged from the pack, instead of being micro managed and engineered to be there.

Each time a bunch of parents feel the heat of the 2 nd and 3rd level on their heels, they enable the Club system with $$$ to establish a new league.

The parents of the " top players" constantly need their egos stroked, and the Clubs are right there with their hands out to provide it. Youth soccer has less and less to do with children, and more and more to do about parents.

Less than generation ago, parents DIDN"T even go watch them play. Now they live it nearly 24/7. And the money thrown at it ?You think that's progress ? You think that's healthy?

Then go back to LaLa Land. That is not how the world works today.

[Unregistered]

Then go back to LaLa Land. That is not how the world works today.

I'll take my " la la land " approach that raised healthy adjusted kids that didn't need parents who " engineer " their success.

[Unregistered]

Youth sports mirror child development theories so if you don't like the way they operate look to how society raises its children and change that first. The theme of all of the counter points in this thread is the system doesn't have to work for everyone. The sort of idealism all of you are espousing is utopian and just doesn't work. There are entities in place that provide the level of soccer and sort of experience many of you seek. Typically it is found in community based programs. The problem with them is they mostly focus on the experience so players don't get much of a challenge out of them. Eventually the bulk of the players lose interest so the numbers peter out and you have problems fielding teams. In a free market environment there will always be a club around to provide the same type of service but what many people find out is the price jumps dramatically and the quality ends up not being comensurate with that cost. Who's problem is that though? Is that really the top end of the market pulling those people up into a realm that they are not prepared for or is it that other end of the market who are trying to find something that really can't be delivered? The problem is that as price goes up so too do expectations and that segement of the soccer player population typcially doesn't want to meet those higher expectations so it becomes a catch 22. People get charged more so they expect more but then don't want to pay the price to fulfill the increased expectations that come with incrementally better coaching so then everything sucks. I'm sorry, the solution isn't to tear everything down so the casual player can have a better experience. The solution is to either demand better from your clubs or set more realistic expectations

" Youth sports mirror child development theories..." Maybe in general, but certainly not what Youth Soccer has evolved to be today.

[Unregistered]

I'll take my " la la land " approach that raised healthy adjusted kids that didn't need parents who " engineer " their success.

You know what, if you raised kids today the way that prior generations did chances are either the state would step in and take them away or charge you with a crime. Old school things like encouraing your boy to stand up for themselves and fight back against bullies will result in serve ramifications against both you and them. The world has changed and parenting is not nearly as simple you would like it to be.

[Unregistered]

You know what, if you raised kids today the way that prior generations did chances are either the state would step in and take them away or charge you with a crime. Old school things like encouraing your boy to stand up for themselves and fight back against bullies will result in serve ramifications against both you and them. The world has changed and parenting is not nearly as simple you would like it to be.

Sorry to disagree. You are cherry picking . Parenting is as simple as you allow it let to be. It has become more complicated only if the parent becomes more involved than needed and required.

[Unregistered]

Sorry to disagree. You are cherry picking . Parenting is as simple as you allow it let to be. It has become more complicated only if the parent becomes more involved than needed and required.

How old are your kids?? Did they even have cell phones (never mind sexting) when your children were teenagers? Sorry, different world requires different solutions. Sitting back and letting things roll didn't work nearly as well as you might think. You probably weren't raised the same way your parents were, I know I wasn't. The really humorous thing is chances are probably pretty good at least one of your children has spent time on a therapists coach bitching about their parents just like every generation does. Your parents weren't perfect, neither were you.

[Unregistered]

How old are your kids?? Did they even have cell phones (never mind sexting) when your children were teenagers? Sorry, different world requires different solutions. Sitting back and letting things roll didn't work nearly as well as you might think. You probably weren't raised the same way your parents were, I know I wasn't. The really humorous thing is chances are probably pretty good at least one of your children has spent time on a therapists coach bitching about their parents just like every generation does. Your parents weren't perfect, neither were you.

You are so far off the mark, it isn't even funny.

Preparing your children properly for the outside world, that's what it is all about. At any time, in any given era.

[Unregistered]

You are so far off the mark, it isn't even funny.

Preparing your children properly for the outside world, that's what it is all about. At any time, in any given era.

Since apparently millions of parents have no clue you should probably write a book and tell them how it should be done. Talk about inflating one's self importance.

[Unregistered]

Since apparently millions of parents have no clue you should probably write a book and tell them how it should be done. Talk about inflating one's self importance.

Well, my son's English Teacher his Freshman year in HS told me I should write a book.

Maybe you would be well served to try and learn something, rather than throw around personal insults.

[Unregistered]

Youth sports mirror child development theories so if you don't like the way they operate look to how society raises its children and change that first. The theme of all of the counter points in this thread is the system doesn't have to work for everyone. The sort of idealism all of you are espousing is utopian and just doesn't work. There are entities in place that provide the level of soccer and sort of experience many of you seek. Typically it is found in community based programs. The problem with them is they mostly focus on the experience so players don't get much of a challenge out of them. Eventually the bulk of the players lose interest so the numbers peter out and you have problems fielding teams. In a free market environment there will always be a club around to provide the same type of service but what many people find out is the price jumps dramatically and the quality ends up not being comensurate with that cost. Who's problem is that though? Is that really the top end of the market pulling those people up into a realm that they are not prepared for or is it that other end of the market who are trying to find something that really can't be delivered? The problem is that as price goes up so too do expectations and that segement of the soccer player population typcially doesn't want to meet those higher expectations so it becomes a catch 22. People get charged more so they expect more but then don't want to pay the price to fulfill the increased expectations that come with incrementally better coaching so then everything sucks. I'm sorry, the solution isn't to tear everything down so the casual player can have a better experience. The solution is to either demand better from your clubs or set more realistic expectations

I think there is a correlation between the proliferation of hyper-successful parents who drive their children towards athletic success with the same intensity they drive them towards academic and social success and the significant growth in the number of parents home-schooling their kids. Home schooling used to be the province of the religious right but now just as many highly educated parents are home-schooling their kids. Just like these parents believe that they know what is best in terms of engineering athletic success they also believe that they know best in engineering and controlling their education.

Public and private schools obviously have flaws but my wife is seeing more and more home schooled students in her college classes. She teaches at several schools and is shocked by the utter lack of preparation for life skills that these kids have. They are helpless when they go off to college because their parents have held their hands every step of the way.

I believe that the adage about representing yourself in court and having "a fool for a lawyer" can be applied to home schooling as well. These parents want to control every aspect of their kids lives and it is not helping them one bit.

[Unregistered]

How old are your kids?? Did they even have cell phones (never mind sexting) when your children were teenagers? Sorry, different world requires different solutions. Sitting back and letting things roll didn't work nearly as well as you might think. You probably weren't raised the same way your parents were, I know I wasn't. The really humorous thing is chances are probably pretty good at least one of your children has spent time on a therapists coach bitching about their parents just like every generation does. Your parents weren't perfect, neither were you.

When I screwed up my parents grounded me and took away privileges.

It worked.

When my daughter screwed up her parents took away privileges.

It worked.

Not only did it work but I told her to her face that she was grounded rather than having a nanny or au pair send her a text.

[Unregistered]

When I screwed up my parents grounded me and took away privileges.

It worked.

When my daughter screwed up her parents took away privileges.

It worked.

Not only did it work but I told her to her face that she was grounded rather than having a nanny or au pair send her a text.

Ha ha, I love it. You have hit the nail on the head. This generation of parents have gone off the edge of the cliff when it comes to paying anyone and everyone else to raise their children. That's part of the root of the problem.

[Unregistered]

Youth sports mirror child development theories so if you don't like the way they operate look to how society raises its children and change that first. The theme of all of the counter points in this thread is the system doesn't have to work for everyone. The sort of idealism all of you are espousing is utopian and just doesn't work. There are entities in place that provide the level of soccer and sort of experience many of you seek. Typically it is found in community based programs. The problem with them is they mostly focus on the experience so players don't get much of a challenge out of them. Eventually the bulk of the players lose interest so the numbers peter out and you have problems fielding teams. In a free market environment there will always be a club around to provide the same type of service but what many people find out is the price jumps dramatically and the quality ends up not being commensurate with that cost. Who's problem is that though? Is that really the top end of the market pulling those people up into a realm that they are not prepared for or is it that other end of the market who are trying to find something that really can't be delivered? The problem is that as price goes up so too do expectations and that segement of the soccer player population typcially doesn't want to meet those higher expectations so it becomes a catch 22. People get charged more so they expect more but then don't want to pay the price to fulfill the increased expectations that come with incrementally better coaching so then everything sucks. I'm sorry, the solution isn't to tear everything down so the casual player can have a better experience. The solution is to either demand better from your clubs or set more realistic expectations

Another good post. With all the hand wringing whiners on here, it is nice to read something intelligent and realistic about this subject. You can't make ever kid a star or hand every kids a meaningful trophy or make every experience "fun" or eliminate pressure from your kids lives -- without dire consequences. They need to grow up. On the other hand, you don't have to throw them to the wolves either. Use your head, try a balanced, intelligent approach that suits YOUR kid, not someone else's, and it will work. If you find them the right team, they will ALWAYS play the game and have fun. It's what kids do.