Cadence calls for local youth football clubs

[Unregistered]

With all the recent discussion of the training regimens for local youth soccer clubs--including a certain club from Beaverton known for a particularly intense training program--I thought it would be fun (and mildly sadistic) to collect military-style cadences for your SS and DD to sing as they pound the pavement.

For those who've never served in the military, or seen war movies, or don't know what a "military cadence" is, it's the call-and-response song that is sung by a unit when they are marching or running in formation. Generally the drill sergeant issues the call, and the men and women sing the response in unison. Some military cadences are X-rated or highly violent, but a clean example is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VEE2spvSHo. Cadences sung in the military generally deal with military life and its depredations and inconveniences. Occasionally one hears references to a pampered civilian named "Jody" (who is often alleged to be seducing the SO of the servicemen--many cadences date back to before women were allowed in the service), and cadences are also known as Jody calls.

In this thread, I am inviting contributions of soccer-themed cadences. As this is a youth soccer thread, keep 'em clean.

[Unregistered]

Some for Westside

E350 cruisin' down the road
Eleven Westside Timbers is the load
Ain't goin' to a match, ain't goin' to school
Coach is takin' us to the Oregon Zoo.
Not to see the critters, not for the thrills
No, we're here running on all these hills
First we run fast and then we run slow
Gotta do them intervals!

I wanna be a Westside Timber
I wanna be so lean and limber

Jody's at home sittin' on the floor
Playing FIFA '16 on his PS4
Drinkin' soda pop, but that's not for me
I'm out here with coach doin' my PT
Hear the zoo train whistling through the trees
Taking people to the garden Japanese
I'd rather get on board and give the ticket man five
Then be here running up Kingston Drive

I wanna be a Westside Timber
I wanna be so lean and limber

Far post footy and Cony K.
Think us suburban kids don't know how to play
The poor kids playing on broken glass
Gonna come out to Walker Road and kick our a**
So we do lots of training and we do it real hard
Then we go and do triangles down in the yard
Gettin in those touches, gettin in those drills
Tomorrow we'll be back up in the hills

I wanna be a Westside Timber
I wanna be so lean and limber

Hunter and Caitlyn, get in the SUV
We're headin' on down to Pacific City
To the end of the cape and back to the lot
Coach wants to see just what you got
While Mom and Dad are lighting up the grill
You're gonna run up and down that hill
Boom box is blasting Chariots of Fire
And that dune it keeps getting' higher and higher

I wanna be a Westside Timber
I wanna be so lean and limber

[Unregistered]

Some more generic ones

containing no references to any particular youth clubs...

Herr Schweinsteiger's rollin' on the pitch
He's got a hangnail and a real bad itch
So he went to Old Trafford and you know what for
'Cause the refs don't give 'em Fergie Time no more
Luis Suarez is very very rude
Went to Brazil for Italian food
The ref didn't see it but the TV man did
So they sent him back to Montevid

Jurgen Klinsmann makes people really mad
'Cause he thinks us yankees play soccer bad
Making his plans for two thousand eighteen
Three keepers and twenty clones of Julian Green
See-attle Sounders think they're a really top crew
Got Dempsey and Alonso and Morris too
But when they look at the Timbers, they are lookin' straight up
'They can't carry our MLS Cup

[Unregistered]

E350 cruisin' down the road
Eleven Westside Timbers is the load
Ain't goin' to a match, ain't goin' to school
Coach is takin' us to the Oregon Zoo.
Not to see the critters, not for the thrills
No, we're here running on all these hills
First we run fast and then we run slow
Gotta do them intervals!

I wanna be a Westside Timber
I wanna be so lean and limber

Jody's at home sittin' on the floor
Playing FIFA '16 on his PS4
Drinkin' soda pop, but that's not for me
I'm out here with coach doin' my PT
Hear the zoo train whistling through the trees
Taking people to the garden Japanese
I'd rather get on board and give the ticket man five
Then be here running up Kingston Drive

I wanna be a Westside Timber
I wanna be so lean and limber

Far post footy and Cony K.
Think us suburban kids don't know how to play
The poor kids playing on broken glass
Gonna come out to Walker Road and kick our a**
So we do lots of training and we do it real hard
Then we go and do triangles down in the yard
Gettin in those touches, gettin in those drills
Tomorrow we'll be back up in the hills

I wanna be a Westside Timber
I wanna be so lean and limber

Hunter and Caitlyn, get in the SUV
We're headin' on down to Pacific City
To the end of the cape and back to the lot
Coach wants to see just what you got
While Mom and Dad are lighting up the grill
You're gonna run up and down that hill
Boom box is blasting Chariots of Fire
And that dune it keeps getting' higher and higher

I wanna be a Westside Timber
I wanna be so lean and limber

Post of the year!

[Unregistered]

One more for Westside

Went on a date last night you see
With a footie-playing girl from THUSC
Her momma really liked me, her dad thinks I'm great
But Tom came after me with a .38

[Unregistered]

Went on a date last night you see
With a footie-playing girl from THUSC
Her momma really liked me, her dad thinks I'm great
But Tom came after me with a .38

You sad people!!! I bet you guys are the life and soul of parties.

[Unregistered]

You sad people!!! I bet you guys are the life and soul of parties.

I thought you'd like it, Tom.

[Unregistered]

Good idea with this thread. Need more clean content.