Coaches that break your players spirit

[Unregistered]

I don’t understand why coaches feel they need to yell at players the whole game. I’m talking girl players not boys. On the boys side that is common, but on the girls side it effects them differently. It makes them not want to play. It causes them to shut down not step up.
The problem with our coach is that he knows he does it. He has said several times that he is going to stop doing it but yet here I am posting about it. These coaches need to forget the girls side and stick to boys. My daughter is at the age that most girls drop out of soccer. This coach better not be the reason my daughter quits.
At this time of the year, what do you do?

You folks do know that in all likelihood a 24 year old single male sitting somewhere at a desk in India wrote this troll comment in order to garner clicks on the site, don't you?

( if it was a genuine post, the First Response should have been, please put your children up for adoption)

[Unregistered]

It is very age and player dependent. One of my players really struggled with a dbag coach in 7th grade. Almost quit altogether and definitely wanted to leave the team midseason. Since we couldn't really do that (and it was a quality team he liked) we worked with him on some coping strategies (like it's ok to keep saying fu*k you to the coach in your head over and over again :)). Then a miracle occurred and the coach was fired in February. The new coach who came in was awesome - very though on the kids but fair, explained what he wanted without yelling etc. By the time my kid made HS varsity a freshman he was better equipped to handle his psycho coach whose cursing would make a sailor blush. He quickly learned how to filter out the noise to get to the message the coach was trying to convey, something younger kids just can't do.

[Unregistered]

I don’t understand why coaches feel they need to yell at players the whole game. I’m talking girl players not boys. On the boys side that is common, but on the girls side it effects them differently. It makes them not want to play. It causes them to shut down not step up.
The problem with our coach is that he knows he does it. He has said several times that he is going to stop doing it but yet here I am posting about it. These coaches need to forget the girls side and stick to boys. My daughter is at the age that most girls drop out of soccer. This coach better not be the reason my daughter quits.
At this time of the year, what do you do?

And older male figure young girls should look up to intimidating them with that horse krap is a bad look any time but especially nowadays. So the coach is not getting it done so he thinks that scaring young girls is a useful tactic. Really? I guess it depends on the situation some and all players are different. I think a coach could be stern without the hostile intimidation part.

[Unregistered]

Soccer parents are the only parents I have come across that complain so much about coaching and coaching interactions with players. I have coached high school basketball and football and have two kids, one played football and now basketball and the other plays soccer her whole life. Teach your kid to persevere and fight through the yelling and use it to fuel them. Has a parent ever heard how soccer coaches or basketball coaches speak to their kids in college? It isn't pretty. Life is hard and life isn't fair, let somebody be hard on your kid. don't quit and leave the team that is teaching your child when the going gets tough we run. Much bigger life lessons at stake here than soccer. Years end move on if you don't like the coach.

[Unregistered]

Soccer parents are the only parents I have come across that complain so much about coaching and coaching interactions with players. I have coached high school basketball and football and have two kids, one played football and now basketball and the other plays soccer her whole life. Teach your kid to persevere and fight through the yelling and use it to fuel them. Has a parent ever heard how soccer coaches or basketball coaches speak to their kids in college? It isn't pretty. Life is hard and life isn't fair, let somebody be hard on your kid. don't quit and leave the team that is teaching your child when the going gets tough we run. Much bigger life lessons at stake here than soccer. Years end move on if you don't like the coach.

You are suggesting somebody's young daughter should tolerate hostility and intimidation from an older male she is supposed to respect and suck it up? What lesson does that teach her? Get a freaking life.

[Unregistered]

Big big difference between school ball and club ball. In club ball, players are customers paying a large large price for the soccer lessons and are in a much stronger position to not have to tolerate a lousy yelling coach. Just as it us very unlikely to find behavior like that from a staff and coaches at fancy private schools.

[Unregistered]

I don’t understand why coaches feel they need to yell at players the whole game. I’m talking girl players not boys. On the boys side that is common, but on the girls side it effects them differently. It makes them not want to play. It causes them to shut down not step up.
The problem with our coach is that he knows he does it. He has said several times that he is going to stop doing it but yet here I am posting about it. These coaches need to forget the girls side and stick to boys. My daughter is at the age that most girls drop out of soccer. This coach better not be the reason my daughter quits.
At this time of the year, what do you do?

To the OP; we’ve faced this dilemma for two seasons at two different clubs. Our daughter is a middle schooler who plays up for her HS school team which is much more civilized (we can’t speak for all HS school teams)and keeps her passion for the sport alive. Maybe consider that as an option.

We also play three other sports , and frankly youth club soccer has become the most toxic of the four. Not only coaches screaming at kids, which absolutely becomes just noise to a 12 year old, but also coaches screaming at refs, parents screaming at both teams, etc. At the end of the day, it’s behavior we do not want modeled in front of our kids, and we certainly don’t want to spend 12-14 hours a week for that behavior to be modeled in front of our kids...where else in life do we allow that to happen except youth soccer? It all contributes to the lack of civility in society..just look at the comments on this forum as an example of that lack of civility.

[Unregistered]

Big big difference between school ball and club ball. In club ball, players are customers paying a large large price for the soccer lessons and are in a much stronger position to not have to tolerate a lousy yelling coach. Just as it us very unlikely to find behavior like that from a staff and coaches at fancy private schools.

Great point and very accurate- we don’t get this behavior from our school coach. Just a theory, but maybe because there is a club on every corner, the sport has been directed into accepting a lot of ‘less than desirable’ coaches....I think most have good intentions at the onset, but pride takes over and winning verses developing players becomes more important...and maybe they’re just aren’t very good at teaching (coaching) the game.

[Unregistered]

You folks do know that in all likelihood a 24 year old single male sitting somewhere at a desk in India wrote this troll comment in order to garner clicks on the site, don't you?

( if it was a genuine post, the First Response should have been, please put your children up for adoption)

totally; but the advertiser i think mistakes clicks with real customers. i would never make a serious purchase decision - airplane tickets, even sporting goods, whatever - based on a banner ad I saw on TS.

[Unregistered]

Equality

I don’t understand why coaches feel they need to yell at players the whole game. I’m talking girl players not boys. On the boys side that is common, but on the girls side it effects them differently. It makes them not want to play. It causes them to shut down not step up.
The problem with our coach is that he knows he does it. He has said several times that he is going to stop doing it but yet here I am posting about it. These coaches need to forget the girls side and stick to boys. My daughter is at the age that most girls drop out of soccer. This coach better not be the reason my daughter quits.
At this time of the year, what do you do?

Yeah, you tell them. And your probably are the first person to say - boys and girls are equal and should be treated equally. Yet, you throw this sissy nonsense around.

And what are you going to do? "better not be the reason"... or what? WHAT? Yeah, that's right. Sit back, yell equality -- and get mad when equality is delivered.

[Unregistered]

Yeah, you tell them. And your probably are the first person to say - boys and girls are equal and should be treated equally. Yet, you throw this sissy nonsense around.

And what are you going to do? "better not be the reason"... or what? WHAT? Yeah, that's right. Sit back, yell equality -- and get mad when equality is delivered.

Lol, he’s an angry elf.

[Unregistered]

Dont be yelling at the boys or the girls Ok? use better and more productive teaching tools all around for all genders. there. Problem solved.

[Unregistered]

No heading too, right?

Dont be yelling at the boys or the girls Ok? use better and more productive teaching tools all around for all genders. there. Problem solved.

***There's a reason most of this country think that soccer is for recreational babysitting or for girls. The same the reason where we are the only country in the world to not allow heading the ball, you all say that yelling should not happen. Yet, you look at every other "real" sport, yelling is accepted and thought to be the norm. Those other sports are where boys learn to be men. They are the real sports in this country.

It is sissies like you - the same ones who no heading would be a good idea to settle a lawsuit, also think yelling should not occur - who contribute the reputation of this great sport of soccer being that for recreational babysitting, sissies, and girls. Get your head out of your a$s, and accept the one true reality. That reality is that it is a real sport and the players deserve to be treated like every other athlete in every other real sport in this country and beyond. ***

[Unregistered]

If a coach is finding himself screaming during the whole game, that coach hasn’t done a very good job during practice.

[Unregistered]

***There's a reason most of this country think that soccer is for recreational babysitting or for girls. The same the reason where we are the only country in the world to not allow heading the ball, you all say that yelling should not happen. Yet, you look at every other "real" sport, yelling is accepted and thought to be the norm. Those other sports are where boys learn to be men. They are the real sports in this country.

It is sissies like you - the same ones who no heading would be a good idea to settle a lawsuit, also think yelling should not occur - who contribute the reputation of this great sport of soccer being that for recreational babysitting, sissies, and girls. Get your head out of your a$s, and accept the one true reality. That reality is that it is a real sport and the players deserve to be treated like every other athlete in every other real sport in this country and beyond. ***

So , take that you sissies! Wait, you can’t head a ball in the United States? Oh no, boys will never learn to be men.