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A Season in the Shadows

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    #31
    Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
    There is one guy typing it and he is the only that reads it. Then he replies to himself "oh my, more please!"

    It's sad but at least as long as he is in his mum's basement typing on here, he is off the streets. So it's a win.
    Hahaha...I could literally envision the veins popping out on your bulbous, flabby, neck as you rage typed that out. I am also a fan of this story. Honestly, I just like being entertained. I give a rip who is being bashed here...DA or ECNL. Maybe even both, who knows? Anyways, please try to not stroke out on this beautiful, holiday weekend. It is only soccer, and where your child plays has no reflection on you. In fact remember this, it is not at all about you.

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      #32
      Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
      Having your local club team play in a league (ECNL) that mirrors the pure fiction posted on this anonymous kiddie soccer forum. A narrative of the peculuar & expensive fantasy now extends to the bowels of the internet. Priceless.

      Stupid yes, but who cares. This outcome was inevitable.
      Winner!
      +1

      Comment


        #33
        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
        There is one guy typing it and he is the only that reads it. Then he replies to himself "oh my, more please!"

        It's sad but at least as long as he is in his mum's basement typing on here, he is off the streets. So it's a win.
        It is really obvious that it is the same guy responding to himself. But to each his own. Let him have a conversation with himself. It doesn't hurt anyone.

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          #34
          Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
          This might be the dumbest thread in the history of Talking Soccer. That is saying something.
          It takes quite an effort to be considered for that honor.

          Comment


            #35
            Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
            +1 This thread literally has me hitting refresh every 15 minutes waiting for next episode. Teen angst + loser parents + an upside down soccer world... it is a reflection of what a lot of us are dealing with.
            Spoiler alert, I think she will pull off the heel kick, but immediately notice that the coach didn't see it because he is again being creepy with the flirty forward who thinks she is all that.
            LOL! So true. I’ve seen the flirty forward that thinks she’s all that get all the attention she wants.

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              #36
              Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
              This might be the dumbest thread in the history of Talking Soccer. That is saying something.
              Ok, really? Have you read some of the stuff posted on here? This might be bad, but it sure as heck isn't hall of fame material. Still very odd.

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                #37
                Soccer mommy should try a BIG BOOK FROM THE BIG REAL WORLD SOME TIME. SURE MAYBE IT WILL TAKE YOU SIX MONTHS TO GET THROUGH A 100 PAGES AND YOU'LL GIVE UP ON IT AND LIE AT THE BOOK CLUB MEETINGS WHEN YOUR DRUNK FROM TO MUCH ROSE...BUT HEY SOCCER MOMMYS ARE THE VERY, VERY, BEST :) MAGA !!!

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                  #38
                  Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                  Soccer mommy should try a BIG BOOK FROM THE BIG REAL WORLD SOME TIME. SURE MAYBE IT WILL TAKE YOU SIX MONTHS TO GET THROUGH A 100 PAGES AND YOU'LL GIVE UP ON IT AND LIE AT THE BOOK CLUB MEETINGS WHEN YOUR DRUNK FROM TO MUCH ROSE...BUT HEY SOCCER MOMMYS ARE THE VERY, VERY, BEST :) MAGA !!!
                  Just when someone says this isn't the dumbest thread in history, on cue, Lenny shows up.

                  Comment


                    #39
                    Who tf is Lenny?

                    Comment


                      #40
                      Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                      Who tf is Lenny?
                      A troll. Kind of the unofficial mascot of TS.

                      Comment


                        #41
                        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                        A troll. Kind of the unofficial mascot of TS.
                        Sweet. I love him / her.

                        Comment


                          #42
                          So....I did the back heel during scrimmage and it was purrfectt ....except Miko got to the ball and took it before Tessa Walter could get to it. I timed it well i thought, but it fizzled out an inch away from Tessa's oncoming foot and I think she would have scored off that ball because there was only Molly to beat to the keeper after that. I was able to watch the ball sitting there, ENTIRELY motionless and untouched for what seemed like an ETERNITY! that was probably 3/100 of a second. Fortunately/unfortunately coach was on the phone with her back turned so it was kinda like "no harm no foul" and I guess it was unseen even by Meg. Meg is the assistant for 3 of our teams. Meg is scary because she is the assistant coach but I swear she has 5 eyes with 3 on her forehead and 2 compound eyes like a fly. A new nickname! But this nickname will have to be 'strategic' kinda like how Mom uses that on Dad. Hmmmm....I could also use "MEG" like the movie which I saw last weekend and highly recommend if you like SHARKS!
                          Ok so then I told Dad about the BACK HEEL and he sat there for a few seconds and then turned and asked me in a soft serious voice... "Does a tree make a sound when it lands in the forest when no one is around to hear it, grasshopper"? It was like WT*, grasshopper???? I stood there very baffled at this. He continued on and said if "no one was there to collect your back heel pass its very much like a tree landing in the forest blah blah... " Still confused, I looked around for the Cape Kiwanda beer bottles but it looked like he really came up with that on his own with no BAC to blame. Musta been a bad day at work or something. Anyway, I patted him on the head and told him to 'please get some rest, Dad, seriously, you've been watching too much Animal Planet"...
                          ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

                          Ok I really don't have much to say about the roster for the Miner game. Its kinda one of the parts of soccer I don't like. I'm super competitive but I don't like disappointment for any of my team except for JERKS. Especially for the loners on the team (yes we have a couple) I have some kind of empathy for when it comes to roster time. I'm just gonna leave this one where it is for now because even more cringy stuff happened at school today. Oh but I did make the roster but that was a given. Our outside backs are my only subs and they don't really have the touch skills needed for centerback. They tend to still boot the ball up or pass back to the keep - lack of creativity but of course I'm not all that either. I know that! In any case, its a new season and we play on the BEST field in the State and at this moment I don't care if not a SINGLE person in my high school knows that I will be starting CENTERBACK on the best team on the WEST COAST (or at least PAC NW)!
                          ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

                          OMG Our school is like a FREAK SHOW! I'm pretty cool about accepting all different kinds of people but we have some serious friggin' WEIRDOS here. A guy in my Math class looks super dirty and crumply and his hair is like a Bald Eagle nest that we saw in Kalama last summer! I was watching him on the sly while we were doing our assessment quiz and dude had a pencil and a HIGHLIGHTER lodged into his hair. HES USING HIS HAIR AS A PENCIL POUCH! And he just routinely pulls things in and out of his hair as if its nothing like a friggin' David Copperfield! The coils in his hair seem to hold the pens and highlighter securely so he has a portable storage facility on top of his HEAD! I can't wait to tell my Mom and Dad - I'm gonna love to see the look on their FACES! This kinda' S&&% didn't happen in PEORIA as they both like to say! Ok I'm sure everyone needed to hear that about 'whats happening in our high schools today'.
                          =========================================
                          ABOUT ME :

                          We took an assessment in English today which was quite interesting : Howard Gardner’s theory of Multiple Intelligences it called. I turned out to be Logic Smart and People Smart. I wasn't surprised by the Logic Smart because math is in my brain but People Smart! No way! I want to take the test again because I'm pretty sure I'm not People Smart out of all the categories. Ok life in not all soccer but I thought Body Smart and Logic Smart and Picture Smart would be good for a soccer player. Picture smart would be cool to visualize whats happening and get the big picture like Coach Meg AKA THE FLY or MEG! (secret!) is ALWAYS saying at practice and on the white board when we do our BIG "post-game analysis" stuff during the season. BIRD MAN (NESTY) is certainly not ready for Multiple Intelligence and needs to get one single Intelligence as he is barely an amoeba or paramecium brain level from what I saw today.

                          I am doing things outside of soccer even though school and soccer are using a lot of my time. I volunteered to help handicapped kids at a gym during the summer and I really enjoyed it. I went once a week and hope to keep being involved in this program as I go through high school. I really don't want to have to respond too much to the posts as I want to keep writing about the real stuff that happens in high school - the good the bad the ugly the weird the cringy the whatever.
                          ==============================================

                          Random stuff going on: Moms getting a job again! - she is some kind of Supply Chain Expert in Oracle (weird name) which she says she can work pretty much anywhere in the world. I went to work with her a couple times and it was pretty cool. She helped keep the company well stocked and watched for problems at the material suppliers all around the world before she got the severance that she and Dad call 'the package'. I want to do something MORE HANDS ON (or FOOTS ON) I think if they even have those jobs when I get out of school. My Dads always saying that Amazon in Seattle is automating everything except we have Amazon PRIME and NETFLIX so I guess hes not too much against it LOL. I love to point out things like that to 'Herm' when he is a hypocrite - its a daughters duty!
                          ==============================

                          So coach asked us if any of us had looked up the Miners record online to see what their ranking is. Holy Moly (I got that expression from my Mom that is old school) I had actually just done that and they are number 16 in the USA on gotsoccer. Most of the girls raised there hand to but then Coach G went crazy! She said NEVER look up ranking because that shows your FEAR! I thought it was just kinda curiosity and getting information but I suppose I can understand why it might make sense to go into every game without that knowledge of what a ranking was. Coach G was a Div 1 player herself and shes really smart so I give her the benefit of the doubt most times. LOL I'm sure she would be taken aback that I don't just flat out believe everything she says!
                          Oh And I found out that the team we're playing is actually called PLACER and they have no GOLD mines anymore. We played a team from Placer back in the NORMAL age group days and they beat us but I remember it was close. Half those players are gone I'm sure as the age group and DA through everything into CRAZINESS. I was in the younger half of the age SPLIT and I couldn't believe it when I got stuck with Elementary School kids after the split. Oh those were the Good old days I actually kind of miss when we were all basically in the same grade.
                          =================================
                          GEM: The Varsity lost last night in the last minute of the game so I'm ACTUALLY KIND OF HAPPY but I pretending I'm sad about the game if I see any of the players. The JV won and I know some of those girls so I'm happy for them actually as they are not really that aggressive about things and they don't even put up POSTERS in the hallways that become ancient and will sit on the walls for weeks before they get trashed with gum and nasty markups and pictures!

                          I'm SO PSYCHED for the MINERS! We will DERAIL the Seven Dwarfs PLACER Mine train! Just like when my brother Jeremy puked on Dad after we went on that ride at Disney! When the puking happened we were kind of surprised and shocked but then I started a little giggle and then Mom started a giggle and pretty soon we were all flat out laughing like crazy (even Jeremy) while the WHOLE WALT DISNEY WORLD stared at us like we we FREAKS!

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                            #43
                            Dreaded Pirate Larry was somewhat worried, as he looked down at his boot, where his first mate was stretched out, making whooshing sounds, attempting to blow him over, that despite having the fastest ship, the most eye patches, and the prettiest parrots, his crew may need a few lessons on the difference between literal and figurative, as evidenced by the rest of the crew applying ice to the timbers.

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                              #44
                              This date is going horribly wrong she thought staring in vegan disgust at the charred remains sizzling in his fajita skillet -- her large, luminous, sectoral heterochromic eyes that had a limbal ring of deepest grey flickering angrily in the flame of a beeswax candle filtering the air around them.

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                                #45
                                It was a dark and stormy night. The eighteen members of FC Lake Windsor, shivering in their rain-drenched kits, huddled together under an alcove as thunder roared in the distance. Their coach, reportedly a budding star in the Premier League until his career was derailed by a freak groin injury, cursed in disgust. "Bloody hell", he groused, "another thirty minutes!" in his Northern accent that was, to the assembled American girls that were his charges, indistinguishable from that of the Queen.

                                Coach Nigel liked it that way. Even though his hometown was about as far north as one could get without crossing into Scotland, it did not matter in the United States, where nobody could tell a Welshman from a West-ender, a Scouser from a Scotsman, or a Cornish git from the dean of Cambridge. As Gerard Derpardieu famously remarked in the movie _Addicted to Love_, here he was a superstar. A cousin to Sir Alex Ferguson himself. A football superstar--except these clueless yanks called it "soccer", unless they wanted to act sophisticated. But although it was a long way from his childhood dreams of playing in Old Trafford, it was a decent gig. His accent often got him a pint down at the pub, and would often get him laid before marriage put an end to all of that. And these eighteen girls, as well as their parents in the tony upper class subdivision of Lake Windsor, all thought he was a genius, and it was their fees and generous donations that paid his salary. So, he figured as the throng shivered in the cold, with eighteen girls from the opposing team shivering in another alcove nearby (and the parents, presumably, waiting out the storm in their cars), that things could be far worse.

                                And then the small voice of his holding midfielder--a small girl, who despite a diminutive stature was as fierce as a pit bull--piped up over the wind and rain.

                                "Coach Nigel?" she said. "I really, really, REALLY gotta pee".

                                All the doors to Lake Windsor High School were locked at this hour, and the lone porta-potty was located across two fields, and behind a metal fence. Another flash of lightning illuminated the sky, with the report of the thunder booming only seconds later. The storm was upon him.

                                At that moment, Nigel Southwick, decided that he REALLY wished he had taken up acting instead.

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