So what should coaches look for in parents

[Unregistered]

I agree with you. I was really disappointed to finally see how little my son's coach cared about him (or the other kids for that matter). For most of them it's a job when it should be their pursuit. When the game's over, they walk away and their job is done. A bit sad.

That is because they are very busy looking for the next Messi and C Ronaldo. God knows why?

[Unregistered]

Shut all the soccer competive programs down and get rid of coaches. Assess kids at six and send off to soccer camps for the protégés.

No not at all. We should still have competitive soccer and programs but parents need to realize there is only so much a coach can do for your kid. If he is not talented to begin with, a coach can't give him talent. A coach can't make your kid good. Parents expectations need to realize great players are born, not made.

Give the coach a break and don't get fired up because little johnny or Susie is still no good after years of training, skills classes and out of state tournaments. He just does not have IT, and the coach can't give IT to him.

Messi and C Ronaldo had IT from a young age and everyone knew it. They were playing up two to three years when they were 10 and 11 and still dominating. Not worried about some coach and hanging on to playing time on a third tier team.

[Unregistered]

Back to the original post.....big tits and the ability to pay, with either taking precedence.

[Unregistered]

No not at all. We should still have competitive soccer and programs but parents need to realize there is only so much a coach can do for your kid. If he is not talented to begin with, a coach can't give him talent. A coach can't make your kid good. Parents expectations need to realize great players are born, not made.

Give the coach a break and don't get fired up because little johnny or Susie is still no good after years of training, skills classes and out of state tournaments. He just does not have IT, and the coach can't give IT to him.

Messi and C Ronaldo had IT from a young age and everyone knew it. They were playing up two to three years when they were 10 and 11 and still dominating. Not worried about some coach and hanging on to playing time on a third tier team.

Dear Coach,
you are not at all asked to train, but you choose to train and become coach. You are not even asked to produce Messi's and Ronaldo's. Just all you need to do is: KNOW why you are there? Are you there to teach soccer skills or are you there to teach "UNFAIR" treatment is acceptable practice? Show your ugliness and get paid for that?
Are you trusted to build confidence in little kids or are your actions destroying it?
Do you really have what it takes it to be a coach?

No parents in this world want anything less than the best they can get for their child. Do you have the capability to provide the best and equal opportunity to all? That is what TALENT looks like in a coach. Can you manage that?

Please stop coming here and quoting Messi/Ronaldo with make up stories.
Just read this:
"....This means it has never been a fact that Ronaldo would become one based upon his talent. For both Messi and Ronaldo nobody knew for sure they would be a professional football player in the future. Then what has been the key for Messi and Ronaldo? Practice! According to Ericsson (2006) – who is a psychologist – we need 10.000 hours of deliberate practice to become an expert in that field. If you have a dream, ...."

http://www.thesportinmind.com/articl...-born-or-made/

Now think what is made and what is born?

[Unregistered]

Dear Coach,
you are not at all asked to train, but you choose to train and become coach. You are not even asked to produce Messi's and Ronaldo's. Just all you need to do is: KNOW why you are there? Are you there to teach soccer skills or are you there to teach "UNFAIR" treatment is acceptable practice? Show your ugliness and get paid for that?
Are you trusted to build confidence in little kids or are your actions destroying it?
Do you really have what it takes it to be a coach?

No parents in this world want anything less than the best they can get for their child. Do you have the capability to provide the best and equal opportunity to all? That is what TALENT looks like in a coach. Can you manage that?

Please stop coming here and quoting Messi/Ronaldo with make up stories.
Just read this:
"....This means it has never been a fact that Ronaldo would become one based upon his talent. For both Messi and Ronaldo nobody knew for sure they would be a professional football player in the future. Then what has been the key for Messi and Ronaldo? Practice! According to Ericsson (2006) – who is a psychologist – we need 10.000 hours of deliberate practice to become an expert in that field. If you have a dream, ...."

http://www.thesportinmind.com/articl...-born-or-made/

Now think what is made and what is born?

HA , HA HA!!!
You cite to an article by a child psychologist with a bent toward voodoo science to prove your point. Just keep thinking a coach can turn your little clumsy, slow, non-agile kid into a player and see how far that gets you. Here's what it will get you, a soccer community of angry parents ( we have that), a soccer community of parents that yell at their kids and ask them to do things they don't have the talent to do( check we have that), a soccer community of parents that think the coach is at fault for not making their kids better, hence we change teams every year ( check, we have that).

Suck it up and realize talent is a gift from god and not all are gifted. Your kid, my kid and probably everyone reading this's kid could practice as much as Messi and CR7 and still be average.

By the way, Messi was good enough for a club to pay for his family to move to Spain and pay for his medical ( probably stood out a little)

CR7 played up several age groups and dominated. (probably a bit noticeable)

Good luck with your little hard workers. Just give them a break and don't put too much pressure on them because they can't help it if god did not give them the talent.

[Unregistered]

Dear Coach,
you are not at all asked to train, but you choose to train and become coach. You are not even asked to produce Messi's and Ronaldo's. Just all you need to do is: KNOW why you are there? Are you there to teach soccer skills or are you there to teach "UNFAIR" treatment is acceptable practice? Show your ugliness and get paid for that?
Are you trusted to build confidence in little kids or are your actions destroying it?
Do you really have what it takes it to be a coach?

No parents in this world want anything less than the best they can get for their child. Do you have the capability to provide the best and equal opportunity to all? That is what TALENT looks like in a coach. Can you manage that?

Please stop coming here and quoting Messi/Ronaldo with make up stories.
Just read this:
"....This means it has never been a fact that Ronaldo would become one based upon his talent. For both Messi and Ronaldo nobody knew for sure they would be a professional football player in the future. Then what has been the key for Messi and Ronaldo? Practice! According to Ericsson (2006) – who is a psychologist – we need 10.000 hours of deliberate practice to become an expert in that field. If you have a dream, ...."

http://www.thesportinmind.com/articl...-born-or-made/

Now think what is made and what is born?

Talk about building a strawman. Where did anyone say they don't treat players fairly, instill confidence or try to bring out the best in each player?

The problem is the parents that think the kid has what it takes to get to the next level when they clearly don't, that is all.

Coaches coach because they love the game, enjoy teaching the kids skills and want them to get better and succeed. When parents have too high expectations, it hinders that job. Maybe it is good if your kid plays 50% of the game, is on the C team and has a good sense of himself. But when his mom yells the coach sucks or doesn't know anything because her little Johnny can't make the A team be the leading scorer somehow that is the coaches fault.

Parents need to turn that analytical eye on themselves and how they are hurting their kids chances of being the best they can be.

[Unregistered]

HA , HA HA!!!
You cite to an article by a child psychologist with a bent toward voodoo science to prove your point. Just keep thinking a coach can turn your little clumsy, slow, non-agile kid into a player and see how far that gets you. Here's what it will get you, a soccer community of angry parents ( we have that), a soccer community of parents that yell at their kids and ask them to do things they don't have the talent to do( check we have that), a soccer community of parents that think the coach is at fault for not making their kids better, hence we change teams every year ( check, we have that).

Suck it up and realize talent is a gift from god and not all are gifted. Your kid, my kid and probably everyone reading this's kid could practice as much as Messi and CR7 and still be average.

By the way, Messi was good enough for a club to pay for his family to move to Spain and pay for his medical ( probably stood out a little)

CR7 played up several age groups and dominated. (probably a bit noticeable)

Good luck with your little hard workers. Just give them a break and don't put too much pressure on them because they can't help it if god did not give them the talent.

You speak like a "Lord of Soccer"

Were you born with IT to Coach? Did GOD give you TALENT to COACH? If you don't have IT, how can you ever give IT to someone else? In that case, doesn't that make you a LIER? Quit Coaching.

You are a loser in life and spread that cancer to rest of the community with your negativity. In your mind, USA cannot even compete at world level, reason is being YOU! You have no idea how many Messi's/Ronaldo equivalents you have destroyed so far!!

When you select players at tryouts, dont you know what you are signing up for? Do you go and tell the parents and those kids: Kid and Parent "..your little clumsy, slow, non-agile kid ... will be a future loser like me if I coach you"
But all I need is your MONEY!!!

[Unregistered]

HA , HA HA!!!
You cite to an article by a child psychologist with a bent toward voodoo science to prove your point. Just keep thinking a coach can turn your little clumsy, slow, non-agile kid into a player and see how far that gets you. Here's what it will get you, a soccer community of angry parents ( we have that), a soccer community of parents that yell at their kids and ask them to do things they don't have the talent to do( check we have that), a soccer community of parents that think the coach is at fault for not making their kids better, hence we change teams every year ( check, we have that).

Suck it up and realize talent is a gift from god and not all are gifted. Your kid, my kid and probably everyone reading this's kid could practice as much as Messi and CR7 and still be average.

By the way, Messi was good enough for a club to pay for his family to move to Spain and pay for his medical ( probably stood out a little)

CR7 played up several age groups and dominated. (probably a bit noticeable)

Good luck with your little hard workers. Just give them a break and don't put too much pressure on them because they can't help it if god did not give them the talent.

Haha always a circle on TS. Messi also needed good coaching, expenses paid by club. No one can argue that the most talented players need both natural (genes, athleticism, IQ, temperament,..) and environmental gifts (coaching, support system, exposure to game, $$,..) to make it far!

[Unregistered]

"....The problem is the parents that think the kid has what it takes to get to the next level when they clearly don't, that is all. .."

.

How do you decide this? Just your opinion is imposed on little kids?
Every kid you had selected in your career as coach has turned out to be the right choice? Are you sure?

[Unregistered]

What if teachers won't teach a child because the parents are dramatic Or high maintenance? i can understand how a high drama student or player could affect the class or team environment. If the player is a superstar but not able to function with team, then may need to reconsider having the player on team. But a player should not be penalized for being born to lunatic parents. A good coach is not shaken or worried about the parents but focused on the players.

Sorry but this is not school this a team sport. I do not have to deal with lunatic parents. I am telling you right now if you constantly ride me on how much you kid plays, why he does not play and pick fights with referees and other parents I will cut your kid.

You see as coach I am responsible for the actions of our fans. I have been suspended suspended by FYSA for a game or two because parent verbally assaulted a referee. I do not need that crap and it is not fair to the other kids for their coach not to be there.

[Unregistered]

You speak like a "Lord of Soccer"

Were you born with IT to Coach? Did GOD give you TALENT to COACH? If you don't have IT, how can you ever give IT to someone else? In that case, doesn't that make you a LIER? Quit Coaching.

You are a loser in life and spread that cancer to rest of the community with your negativity. In your mind, USA cannot even compete at world level, reason is being YOU! You have no idea how many Messi's/Ronaldo equivalents you have destroyed so far!!

When you select players at tryouts, dont you know what you are signing up for? Do you go and tell the parents and those kids: Kid and Parent "..your little clumsy, slow, non-agile kid ... will be a future loser like me if I coach you"
But all I need is your MONEY!!!

OK, you're right, just tell your kid to keep practicing and he will one day be the next great soccer player. But don't complain when at age 15 he is cut from his team because he simply doesn't have the gift and ask you why.

It's called being realistic and observing the history of players that actually make it. The third team left back at age 8 does not become a pro. He decides to take up another sport, quits sports or just becomes a regular joe like the rest of the world. There is nothing wrong with that. People all want to thing their kid has the gift, and get mad when faced with reality.

I tell parents to have fun with their kids soccer, tell them to work hard but school is more important and don't turn your life upside down for soccer. And yes, I don't pick the clumsy, slow kids for my team if I can help it. It is competitive and we are trying to win. No reason to pick bad players if I can help it.

[Unregistered]

How do you decide this? Just your opinion is imposed on little kids?
Every kid you had selected in your career as coach has turned out to be the right choice? Are you sure?

You can never be sure if you always made the right choices. The point is it really doesn't matter if I coach them or someone else coaches them. If they have the gift, they will make it either way, the coaching is largely irrelevant for the special player. For everyone else, you are trying to teach them the right things and give them the tools, the rest is up to them and god.

The cream rises to the top. Always has, and always will. And yes, most of the time you can at least see who is NOT the cream at a young age.

[Unregistered]

Agree, good training is a must for the money paid. Are you providing it?

Please explain in detail what entitles a player to playing time?

Why any players should not be ENTITLED for equal opportunity and playing time?
Are YOU as Coach scared and not confident about your pick you made at tryouts and failed to follow up through training?
Are you afraid of losing a game and that is why you bring guest players which you did not train and they do not want to join your team knowing you are a crappy coach but want to steal other players ENTITLEMENT?

$$$$ MONEY, Wine/Booze, Skin color, Tops/Bottoms, size and speed is that what gets playing time? Be transparent and accountable to your actions. Chances of You creating any super stars is ZERO but chances of you ruining self-confidence of your many players is almost certain!
Be a maker and not a destroyer!!!

I am the OP and coach of this thread. I do not have guest players on my team, well scratch that. I have but only when I down to 14 players or less and needs subs. While my boys can certainly play 80 minutes it is not fair when the other team can sub players in and out. So I bring guest players who perfectly understand that they are just that and get less playing time then my players

You earn your playing time due to your ability, hard work, attitude and attendance at practice. Oh BTW I have made my team give me their report cards. Bad grades means no playing time on my team.

[Unregistered]

How do you decide this? Just your opinion is imposed on little kids?
Every kid you had selected in your career as coach has turned out to be the right choice? Are you sure?

Look you can tell which kid has soccer talent really early. I remember coaching at the YMCA and I had little 4 year olds. You could see the non athletic kids that would just toe the ball. Then there was this kid who kicked at 4 years of age perfectly with that nice thump sound. He was popping out of the herd and would score 8 goals a game and I had to keep him of the field or he would score at will. I followed this kid and he was always a star; at 6vs6, 8vs8 11vs 11 and ended up in playing in college.

[Unregistered]

OK, you're right, just tell your kid to keep practicing and he will one day be the next great soccer player. But don't complain when at age 15 he is cut from his team because he simply doesn't have the gift and ask you why.

It's called being realistic and observing the history of players that actually make it. The third team left back at age 8 does not become a pro. He decides to take up another sport, quits sports or just becomes a regular joe like the rest of the world. There is nothing wrong with that. People all want to thing their kid has the gift, and get mad when faced with reality.

I tell parents to have fun with their kids soccer, tell them to work hard but school is more important and don't turn your life upside down for soccer. And yes, I don't pick the clumsy, slow kids for my team if I can help it. It is competitive and we are trying to win. No reason to pick bad players if I can help it.

I am the OP again and thanks for the post and I agree 100%. There is nothing wrong with your kid not having top talent in soccer, He is probably good in something else. I just hate unrealistic parents that put their kid in competitive soccer and then start flipping out when there son is put at 3rd string.