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    #16
    Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
    She doesn't look like the best player now. Having trouble with the style and clicking with her coach. She's better than she looks right now.
    Sounds normal, TBH.

    Every kid I have ever known, including my own, struggles when coming into a better club. Almost all get it in time, but some don't.

    What does the coach think?

    Comment


      #17
      Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
      If she is new this is not a new phenomenon getting put on a lower team. If she can not earn her way to the next level over the course of this year, then perhaps you should re-evaluate your view of her abilities. She has a chance to earn her way up, so don't put in her head that the team stinks and the system is rigged and there is nothing she can do. Everyone can't be the striker or a CM. Tell her to be more active in her current position (let me guess, outside back?) and make overlapping runs as an outside mid whenever she can. If she is active and does good things when she gets touches it is hard not to notice .... especially if she does it when scrimmaging the team she wants to be on (if they ever scrimmage each other). Sorry Barcelona didn't take her, now teach her about character and working hard to achieve what you want even if she didn't get what she thinks she deserved out of the gate. It's early in the season, tell her to be the best player on this team or get comfortable there.
      Also do teams ever move players up mid-year? Right now she's not having fun. She might stick around if she could maybe move up this year sometime. Otherwise I think she is all set after fall.

      Comment


        #18
        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
        Also do teams ever move players up mid-year? Right now she's not having fun. She might stick around if she could maybe move up this year sometime. Otherwise I think she is all set after fall.
        Yes it they are capable of and if they've "outgrown" where they are. It happened to us. But, it also didn't happen overnight. It went from a year of "No", to a couple of years of moving up to practice only, then one spring it became permanent.

        Honestly, you admit she's not looking like the best player on the team so I don't see why they would consider her to move up. Without knowing more details, doesn't sound like she deserves to move up and she's at the right level she should be at (based on your words only).

        Comment


          #19
          Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
          Yes it they are capable of and if they've "outgrown" where they are. It happened to us. But, it also didn't happen overnight. It went from a year of "No", to a couple of years of moving up to practice only, then one spring it became permanent.

          Honestly, you admit she's not looking like the best player on the team so I don't see why they would consider her to move up. Without knowing more details, doesn't sound like she deserves to move up and she's at the right level she should be at (based on your words only).
          Maybe. I feel like she's capable of more. I want her to get her chance but does not feel like she's on the radar currently. Doesn't even start on her team.

          Comment


            #20
            Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
            Maybe. I feel like she's capable of more. I want her to get her chance but does not feel like she's on the radar currently. Doesn't even start on her team.
            How old?

            She's not a candidate to move up.

            Comment


              #21
              Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
              How old?

              She's not a candidate to move up.
              On the younger side. Don't want to post exact age group.

              My hope now is that they move up a couple of the girls that do well now and maybe mine will have a chance to prove herself.

              Comment


                #22
                Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                On the younger side. Don't want to post exact age group.

                My hope now is that they move up a couple of the girls that do well now and maybe mine will have a chance to prove herself.

                Aaah, gotcha.

                It's not common from what I've seen as the higher teams are already staffed.

                Comment


                  #23
                  Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                  Also do teams ever move players up mid-year? Right now she's not having fun. She might stick around if she could maybe move up this year sometime. Otherwise I think she is all set after fall.
                  Some do, but if you admit she doesnt not look great, then she has work to do. Learning a new style (even if you don't like it) is not a bad thing. Can she adjust and overcome? Isn't that the more important lesson here than starting on the "A" team? Quitting mid-year because she didn't get her way? What an impression that will leave for life! Perhaps you guys made a mistake. Perhaps the coach is right. Work harder and over come your mistake and show the coach what kind of player you think she is. Two of my kids right now are absolutely on the wrong team for their style right now. One is one of the strongest players on a kickball team and the other is a technical kid on a kickball team. Both of my kids are average speed and fitness, so this is a great opportunity for them to each work on the fitness part of the game. They both also have the opportunity to be leaders on their teams and help them to get over the hump and become a better team. They will both play a ton on these teams and they also have the ability to work a lot on their 1v1 skills. Maybe their teams will improve over the course of the year (each has a new coach that we like, but the team, as a whole, has not been coached well over the years and this is evident). My kids are learning a new game and have plenty to work on as they do it. I am confident they will be stronger in more than one way at the end of this year. Tryouts are 8 months away and I am not having them loaf and complain for all of that time. Quitting is not an option. Honestly, they both recognize that neither of their teams is great, but they like their teammates and coaches and i think they are hopeful that it can be fixed. I don't know about you, but dealing with adversity can be done well or not done at all ..... life is full of it and no one dies here if you make a bad choice. Help them to make the best of and overcome an obstacle, not quit because of it.

                  Comment


                    #24
                    Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                    On the younger side. Don't want to post exact age group.

                    My hope now is that they move up a couple of the girls that do well now and maybe mine will have a chance to prove herself.
                    Listen, you have a bad attitude about this. You can't hope she will "earn" a spot because they lost players. If she is a first year premier player, give her time and stop with unrealistic expectations. Work with her in the back yard. Does she have a great first touch? Does she have confidence? Is she lightning fast? Does she know the game? All of this stuff (except the speed part) takes time to learn. Relax! Take a deep breath and stop worrying. If you see holes in her game go out in the yard and help her to patch them. All that stuff will stick with time and you will forge a better relationship with her for doing it .... and teach her a great lesson .... hard work means something. If you let your anxiety fester, she will quit (now or in a year .... it wont matter). You are worrying about the wrong stuff. The team she is on and has not much to do with how fast she learns this game and how much she learns to love it. Get to the top of this team (at least top 3) and then worry about moving. For now, work to get more PT by fixing the holes in her game .... and, by all means .... praise her when she does get something and you see it in a practice .... in a game .... consistently .... then go on to the next project, rinse and repeat.

                    Comment


                      #25
                      Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                      Listen, you have a bad attitude about this. You can't hope she will "earn" a spot because they lost players. If she is a first year premier player, give her time and stop with unrealistic expectations. Work with her in the back yard. Does she have a great first touch? Does she have confidence? Is she lightning fast? Does she know the game? All of this stuff (except the speed part) takes time to learn. Relax! Take a deep breath and stop worrying. If you see holes in her game go out in the yard and help her to patch them. All that stuff will stick with time and you will forge a better relationship with her for doing it .... and teach her a great lesson .... hard work means something. If you let your anxiety fester, she will quit (now or in a year .... it wont matter). You are worrying about the wrong stuff. The team she is on and has not much to do with how fast she learns this game and how much she learns to love it. Get to the top of this team (at least top 3) and then worry about moving. For now, work to get more PT by fixing the holes in her game .... and, by all means .... praise her when she does get something and you see it in a practice .... in a game .... consistently .... then go on to the next project, rinse and repeat.
                      Agreed. The posts from the OP are strange as well. First, he says this is the 1st year his kid is playing club soccer, then says she doesn't even start on the existing Premier team, then admits she doesn't look that great and is having trouble with the style, complains that she isn't playing her preferred position, then complains that his kid isn't on the higher level NPL team? And wants to quit mid year? This almost sounds like a troll poster, but nevertheless a clueless nightmare of a soccer parent. Going straight from town ball to NPL. That's a good one too.

                      Comment


                        #26
                        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                        Agreed. The posts from the OP are strange as well. First, he says this is the 1st year his kid is playing club soccer, then says she doesn't even start on the existing Premier team, then admits she doesn't look that great and is having trouble with the style, complains that she isn't playing her preferred position, then complains that his kid isn't on the higher level NPL team? And wants to quit mid year? This almost sounds like a troll poster, but nevertheless a clueless nightmare of a soccer parent. Going straight from town ball to NPL. That's a good one too.
                        Not a troll and I admit I don't know how it all works so I'm sorry if I sound foolish.

                        My kid plays on other teams. She does very well. She has several friends who play on this club team so we came over. I didn't realize NPL was so hard to get to. She was always strong on her travel team and just going off what other parents said I thought she would be on the highest team here. We got here and she isn't. And add to that she is struggling. I don't mean to sound like a jerk, I only meant that I know she's capable of being better and I wasn't so much asking if SHE could possiby move mid year as I was wondering if her teammates might, letting her have a chance at starting and growing. It seems there are maybe 2 or 3 girls who are stronger than the others right now and i just hoped if they moved my girl might relax and grow. As for quitting she just doesn't like it right now. Hopefully that changes.

                        Comment


                          #27
                          I still haven't seen where you said what she wants? I may have missed it.

                          New players coming into a higher league struggle initially. Most get it and integrate fine over time, not all. The speed and physicality takes some getting used to. Same game, just have to be quicker and stronger.

                          The other thing is generally teams are deeper. Instead of having 2-3 players to worry about, you have 8-9. Outside backs are center-mids in their background, for example....

                          But, either way, a conversation with the coach is absolutely in order. Just ask him/her for a few minutes after practice. Be honest: She's come from a lower environment and it hasn't been smooth. You will get some standard "she's doing great, we'll get there, etc.", but if you give specific examples you will likely get specific answers.

                          Comment


                            #28
                            Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                            I still haven't seen where you said what she wants? I may have missed it.

                            New players coming into a higher league struggle initially. Most get it and integrate fine over time, not all. The speed and physicality takes some getting used to. Same game, just have to be quicker and stronger.

                            The other thing is generally teams are deeper. Instead of having 2-3 players to worry about, you have 8-9. Outside backs are center-mids in their background, for example....

                            But, either way, a conversation with the coach is absolutely in order. Just ask him/her for a few minutes after practice. Be honest: She's come from a lower environment and it hasn't been smooth. You will get some standard "she's doing great, we'll get there, etc.", but if you give specific examples you will likely get specific answers.
                            Agreed. And YOU have to be realistic as a parent. She has to adjust to the speed and brutality of this new game. It sounds like she is not used to it, but this is normal and you just have to wait until mid-spring to better gauge what she has learned (they should learn some stuff this fall, learn a lot over the winter, and you should start to see it in her play by mid-spring ..... especially when she gets more comfortable and focuses more on playing the game than avoiding making mistakes.

                            YOU also have to change your measures for quality. If booting the ball was her strength in travel, then you should be recognizing (if you went to a halfway decent club) that this "skill" of hers is no longer valuable. For younger players, the game should be about developing real technical skills such as receiving a ball (on the ground or in the air), dribbling, any types of moves, beating players 1v1 and they should be starting to learn to combine with other teammates to get out of trouble. Did her travel team use 1-2s often? If not, her new team should be and she needs to learn and trust that simple move. Its an easy concept, but for a defensively-oriented player, it is not easy to trust many teammates and then move out of position to get the ball back. Heck, most travel and premier players struggle with movement off the ball anyway, so you have to give her time to learn the game. You better stop worrying about what she can't do yet, it will drive both of you mad. Pick out a single thing or two that she needs immediately (first touch, dribbling ....) and help her. Once you get her over a couple of initial humps, she will continue to gain steam and pick up the next thing and the next thing ...... and, yes, this is YOUR job, not anyone else's, including her coach .... if you wait for them to fix your kid's issues, you will be old and grey and your kid out of soccer. Coaches generally have 12-20 kids per roster so they can not spend inordinate amounts of time individually coaching kids (especially new kids who come in with little or no knowledge of the game or skill). Many coaches also have more than 1 team. You accepted a position for her and how you have to step in and help her get over the first hurdle. Hopefully, they saw something in her (hopefully she just isn't there to fill a roster for a check) that got her a spot, but now it is up to her and you to catch up.

                            BTW, you said she has several friends that also play with her on this new team. How is she in relation to them in travel soccer? On the new team? That pecking order won't change if you don't do something to improve her skills and you also need to understand that unfamiliarity and new teams often hamper a player as they often play without confidence or they play to avoid mistakes. They may also have to learn a completely new style of game than they are familiar with (or agree with). Give it time and don't worry. Check back in in May and compare where she was in September to where she is at that point and let us know if she made any improvements.

                            Comment


                              #29
                              Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                              Not a troll and I admit I don't know how it all works so I'm sorry if I sound foolish.

                              My kid plays on other teams. She does very well. She has several friends who play on this club team so we came over. I didn't realize NPL was so hard to get to. She was always strong on her travel team and just going off what other parents said I thought she would be on the highest team here. We got here and she isn't. And add to that she is struggling. I don't mean to sound like a jerk, I only meant that I know she's capable of being better and I wasn't so much asking if SHE could possiby move mid year as I was wondering if her teammates might, letting her have a chance at starting and growing. It seems there are maybe 2 or 3 girls who are stronger than the others right now and i just hoped if they moved my girl might relax and grow. As for quitting she just doesn't like it right now. Hopefully that changes.

                              OK got it. You both need to chill a bit. If she is good enough to play NPL she will eventually get there but I doubt she is. A little story for you...my kid was a good town player who moved to club and yes it was a big change cause the fact was the kids in club were better. However, after her first year she moved from the Select team to the Premier team, as she improved a lot. Then after her 2nd year she moved from Premier to NPL. It took 2 years. So be patient. Your primary concern should be whether she is getting the right training and that the coach is good. Worry about getting the NPL "badge" later. If she is not enjoying herself you need to ask her why.

                              Comment


                                #30
                                Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                                OK got it. You both need to chill a bit. If she is good enough to play NPL she will eventually get there but I doubt she is. A little story for you...my kid was a good town player who moved to club and yes it was a big change cause the fact was the kids in club were better. However, after her first year she moved from the Select team to the Premier team, as she improved a lot. Then after her 2nd year she moved from Premier to NPL. It took 2 years. So be patient. Your primary concern should be whether she is getting the right training and that the coach is good. Worry about getting the NPL "badge" later. If she is not enjoying herself you need to ask her why.
                                Replying to my own post. You mention that she just started playing club and wanted to make NPL. Basically you're telling us she's at least 12 and is just starting to play club. Keep in mind that many of these kids on her team have been playing club for years already. I'd bet my left nut that she isn't ready for NPL.

                                Comment

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