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    #31
    Come on guys. We know what goes on. Coaches schmooze players and parents all the time. There doesn’t need to be anything wrong with the team they are on. Tell them their kid is best they have ever seen but they need to move now or they won’t have spot for them. Most of this goes on at PDP, ODP and when kids guest play or get invited by a friend to train. Parents get bamboozled, have ego massaged and are to weak minded to realize they are nothing more than the latest business transaction. that’s all they need to kiss loyalty and friends goodbye and some of these serial offenders know that to well.

    What they fail to realize is that they often leave a team in a bad way and that’s where having some commitment to your team comes in.

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      #32
      Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
      Come on guys. We know what goes on. Coaches schmooze players and parents all the time. There doesn’t need to be anything wrong with the team they are on. Tell them their kid is best they have ever seen but they need to move now or they won’t have spot for them. Most of this goes on at PDP, ODP and when kids guest play or get invited by a friend to train. Parents get bamboozled, have ego massaged and are to weak minded to realize they are nothing more than the latest business transaction. that’s all they need to kiss loyalty and friends goodbye and some of these serial offenders know that to well.

      What they fail to realize is that they often leave a team in a bad way and that’s where having some commitment to your team comes in.
      The harsh reality with club soccer is that the clubs do zero team building or instruction about being a team member. I have only had one really talented coach attend to this out of all of them over the years. It is a business transaction between the player and the club. If you get some good team spirit it seems to be something of a rarity in higher level club soccer. Probably why many want that school ball experience.

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        #33
        Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
        This is why more serious players leave lower level teams. The want teammates that are committed. Clubs also need to better communicate expectations for commitment. If they want multisport athletes then they need a bigger roster
        I coach an intermediate level team that is full of multisport kids so I carry a max roster. Everyone loves that I don't hassle them for missing games and practices but then have the gall to complain about playing time the few times 18 kids show up to a game. When that happens I just smile and calmly explain that they were the reason that I had to max out roster.

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          #34
          Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
          I coach an intermediate level team that is full of multisport kids so I carry a max roster. Everyone loves that I don't hassle them for missing games and practices but then have the gall to complain about playing time the few times 18 kids show up to a game. When that happens I just smile and calmly explain that they were the reason that I had to max out roster.
          When everyone knows the deal it can work. Problems arise when fuzzy expectations clash with reality.

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            #35
            Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
            Come on guys. We know what goes on. Coaches schmooze players and parents all the time. There doesn’t need to be anything wrong with the team they are on. Tell them their kid is best they have ever seen but they need to move now or they won’t have spot for them. Most of this goes on at PDP, ODP and when kids guest play or get invited by a friend to train. Parents get bamboozled, have ego massaged and are to weak minded to realize they are nothing more than the latest business transaction. that’s all they need to kiss loyalty and friends goodbye and some of these serial offenders know that to well.

            What they fail to realize is that they often leave a team in a bad way and that’s where having some commitment to your team comes in.
            It also cuts the other way. The coach lies toparenysand kids

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              #36
              Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
              It also cuts the other way. The coach lies toparenysand kids
              It does. That's a bigger issue because ultimately they're supposed to be the so called knowledgable decision makers. Not only are parents often times blinded by devotion but many never played the game and really don't have a clue. Too often clubs are hungry to fill rosters or tack on a few extra players to improve the bottom line. In my dream world clubs would give honest feedback after the fall season and give families an out then. But I know it's all about the money. I certainly don't blame families for leaving if their kid is really unhappy, ins't playing, bad fit etc but even more so if they were sold a bill of goods

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                #37
                I think parents hear what they want to hear. I've never had a coach make a promise about anything. I've heard them ask for commitment and effort, and as she got older coaches were up front that there is competition and minutes will go do most deserving.

                The question becomes how "deserving" is determined, but from what I've seen is those less dedicated get dinged the most. Those parents will say it's stupid to be out here practicing in this cold, on vacations, in the rain, etc. will then complain when their kid isn't getting equal playtime.

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                  #38
                  Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                  It does. That's a bigger issue because ultimately they're supposed to be the so called knowledgable decision makers. Not only are parents often times blinded by devotion but many never played the game and really don't have a clue. Too often clubs are hungry to fill rosters or tack on a few extra players to improve the bottom line. In my dream world clubs would give honest feedback after the fall season and give families an out then. But I know it's all about the money. I certainly don't blame families for leaving if their kid is really unhappy, ins't playing, bad fit etc but even more so if they were sold a bill of goods
                  There are some coaches that go above and beyond for the team and families though. Honesty is the best policy with families and the girls/boys unless they are playing in a rec. league, of course

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                    #39
                    Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                    I think parents hear what they want to hear. I've never had a coach make a promise about anything. I've heard them ask for commitment and effort, and as she got older coaches were up front that there is competition and minutes will go do most deserving.

                    The question becomes how "deserving" is determined, but from what I've seen is those less dedicated get dinged the most. Those parents will say it's stupid to be out here practicing in this cold, on vacations, in the rain, etc. will then complain when their kid isn't getting equal playtime.
                    This is more realistic. Parents are not teaching their kids loyalty, they are teaching them to jump ship and making 'commitment' a byword they throw around when they need it. We are making unemployable adults for the future. My job sucks some days, others it doesn't, but I don't just quit when I feel down, I talk to my boss and work through things. That's real life.

                    Comment


                      #40
                      Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                      This is more realistic. Parents are not teaching their kids loyalty, they are teaching them to jump ship and making 'commitment' a byword they throw around when they need it. We are making unemployable adults for the future. My job sucks some days, others it doesn't, but I don't just quit when I feel down, I talk to my boss and work through things. That's real life.
                      Seriously? Are you paying your employer or are they paying you?

                      You want to teach your kids to survive out there? Teach them to not settle for getting treated like an idiot sucker. Fool a family once, shame on the club. Fool a family twice - shame on the family if they stuck around.

                      Comment


                        #41
                        Coaches realize there are two things in families' control: punctuation and effort.

                        Show up, ready to play when practice starts (not climbing out of the car and then needing to get dressed and stretching out and wasting 15 minutes. And, when you are there, don't mess around and work your azz off. If you do those two things, more often than not you will play. Especially at younger ages.

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                          #42
                          Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                          Coaches realize there are two things in families' control: punctuation and effort.

                          Show up, ready to play when practice starts (not climbing out of the car and then needing to get dressed and stretching out and wasting 15 minutes. And, when you are there, don't mess around and work your azz off. If you do those two things, more often than not you will play. Especially at younger ages.
                          Punctuation and effort are also in a coaches control. It is obvious when they are lacking in the coach.

                          Comment


                            #43
                            Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                            Punctuation and effort are also in a coaches control. It is obvious when they are lacking in the coach.
                            So very true.

                            Comment


                              #44
                              Originally posted by Unregistered View Post
                              Punctuation and effort are also in a coaches control. It is obvious when they are lacking in the coach.
                              Or when they spend much of their practices starting at their phones.

                              Comment


                                #45
                                Originally posted by unregistered View Post
                                it does. That's a bigger issue because ultimately they're supposed to be the so called knowledgable decision makers. Not only are parents often times blinded by devotion but many never played the game and really don't have a clue. Too often clubs are hungry to fill rosters or tack on a few extra players to improve the bottom line. In my dream world clubs would give honest feedback after the fall season and give families an out then. But i know it's all about the money. I certainly don't blame families for leaving if their kid is really unhappy, ins't playing, bad fit etc but even more so if they were sold a bill of goods
                                bingo! Spot on!

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